


Star Wars: A Light and Dark Side Romance-A Reylo Story

by disneyrey0821



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-02-20
Packaged: 2019-11-01 04:52:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 16
Words: 31,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17860652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disneyrey0821/pseuds/disneyrey0821
Summary: A Beauty and the Beast Version of a Reylo StoryA galaxy being torn apart. The First Order will stop at nothing until the Resistance is destroyed and all hope is lost. Kylo Ren rules the First Order underneath Supreme Leader Snoke, but is equally is cold and heartless. Only, the Dark Side has not always been the most important thing in his life. Once, there was something else. Rey knows something is missing from her life, despite feeling valuable with her contributions to the cause of the Resistance. She knows that there is something more out there for her. But what? As soon as Kylo Ren meets Rey, he knows that there is something about her that draws him to her and her to him. It would take the strength of an entire galaxy to bring the Light Side and the Dark Side together. But maybe, it is more likely than you would think. Despite their differences, can a relationship work between the two of them? Read and see. Includes other major characters from Star Wars Prequels, Original Trilogy, The Force Awakens, and The Last Jedi.





	1. Prologue

Chaos everywhere. The battle between light and dark rages on. The Empire has fallen, but the First Order has risen amidst its ashes. Countless lives are lost, and all hope seems gone. Supreme Leader Snoke has succeeded Darth Sidious. Kylo Ren now stands in the place of Darth Vader. The joys of life are limited, and terror and fear constantly live in everyone’s hearts. The people are surviving, but for how much longer? Yet, in the distance, there is hope. Hope so strong it is unimaginable, even to the First Order.

Ten years ago, there had been a young man named Ben Solo, the son of Princess Leia and Han Solo. The boy was constantly conflicted by light and dark, never knowing which path to take. He was sent away to train with his uncle, Luke Skywalker, as an effort to turn him towards the light. But such a decision could not be forced. It was his choice alone. Luke Skywalker, sensing the darkness within, attacked Ben, who fought back. In self-defense, he had made his choice to join the darkness. But the choice had never been completely his. So, he was still forced to battle between light and dark. Supreme Leader Snoke had taken him under his tutelage as his apprentice and Ben Solo became Kylo Ren. 


	2. Chapter 2

A young girl, at least nineteen, works on the engines on the ships in the hanger. Her hair is pulled back into three buns, her hazel eyes clearly visible. Her name is Rey. As Rey continues to work on the engines, her hands become sore from the work, but she doesn’t mind. After General Leia and her husband, Han Solo had rescued her from her torturous life on Jakku, she feels that she owes them the world. Scavenging had been no life. It had always been just about survival before she joined the Resistance, who have now become like a family to her. The only one that she has ever known. Instead of always being alone, she now has friends. Finn, especially, is one of her dearest friends. He was a former stormtrooper who had been working for the First Order, before he escaped and renounced the order. If only she could be as brave. She wants her chance to prove that she is valuable to the Resistance. Her skills with machinery and engine work are impressive, to be sure. But it doesn’t seem like enough. She wants to be a hero.

The Resistance is different than she expected. Despite the military rankings, it seems as if everyone is equal and everyone’s ideas are important contributions. The Resistance has come so far since the days of the Rebellion. It is now structured and organized. They are far more prepared for anything that comes their way. Suddenly, Rey looks up as she hears General Leia’s voice. The general always insists that Rey call her Leia, but she could never bring herself to address her as anything less than General. 

“Are you still working on these engines, Rey?” General Leia asks, concern in her voice. Rey has already been working on the engines for several hours.  
“Well, I have to get them up and running in case we need them. We can’t always predict when the First Order will attack next.” General Leia seemed sad when Rey mentioned the First Order. Everyone knew that they had caused a lot of pain throughout the galaxy, but that wasn’t it. The General’s sadness was from loneliness. Had the First Order killed someone she loved? Rey wanted to ask, but she couldn’t. After all the kindness that the General and Han Solo had showed her, it wouldn’t be fair to ask about something that hurt so much. She wasn’t sure if Han Solo felt this same kind of loneliness. He only grew irritable and angry when the First Order was mentioned, as anyone else did. 

“You deserve a break, Rey. Everyone does. I insist.” General Leia smiled at Rey, knowing that if she insisted Rey would feel that it was an order.

“Very well.” Rey relented and started to walk away from the broken engines. 

“We are calling a meeting. I would like you to be in attendance. We’ll need your help.”  
Rey stopped for a moment. They needed her? This would be just the chance she needed to prove her bravery. Rey smiled at the General and the two of them continued to walk towards the conference room. When they entered the room, Rey noticed Finn was already there. She went up to him and gave him a hug. 

“It’s good to see you, Rey. I see you’ve finally taken a break.” Finn smiled, knowing that without the General saying so, Rey would still be working. 

“Rey!” A voice called cheerfully. It was Rose Tico, Finn’s girlfriend. For awhile, Rey had thought that it might be her and Finn together. But during the battle on Crait, and sometime before that, Rose and Finn had fallen in love. She was happy for them, though. Rose was her friend too. They often talked and shared what their lives had been like before the Resistance. Rose had grown up on a mining planet with her sister, Paige. Paige’s life had been lost in an earlier battle this year, and it had been difficult for Rose to go on without her. The two of them were always together and never separated. Being with Finn had helped ease the pain, though. The two of them made a wonderful couple. Rey just wished that she had someone of her own. She knew Han and Leia cared about her, but she wanted something deeper than that. She wanted love. True love. 

“Attention, everyone.” C-3PO, a golden protocol droid, announced. “General Organa is ready to start the meeting.”

Even though Leia and Han were married, she was always addressed as General Organa. But she had insisted that Rey just call her General Leia. C-3PO looked towards General Leia, who stepped forward to address everyone. 

“There has been a recent report regarding the latest activities of the First Order. It would seem that they are planning an attack on us.”

“How do they know where we are?” Finn asked, while Rose held his hand nervously. 

“Apparently, the First Order can track through hyperspace now,” Han Solo said irritably. “So much for it being impossible.”

“If they attack us, there will be nothing left. The Resistance will not survive. We do not have enough resources left to survive, even with all the additional help we have received this year.”  
Now Rey understood why the General had asked her to take a break. The time had come to fight and defend the Resistance. 

“There is only one thing left to do. It is time to negotiate with them.”

“Leia, you can’t.” Han Solo interrupted, but Leia only looked at him, sorrow in her eyes. 

“We have no choice. But we cannot negotiate with the Supreme Leader. We will approach Kylo Ren instead.”

Everyone was still now. Kylo Ren, the monster of the First Order? How could anyone think of trying to negotiate with him? His idea of negotiation meant killing someone. With him, there was no negotiation, only suffering. 

“I know this is not what anyone expected. This was never my plan, but it is our only hope of survival right now. I am sending Han Solo, Finn, and Rey on this mission. Please see me when this meeting is over. Good luck everyone.” Leia remarked sadly as everyone started to leave. If they were truly negotiating with Kylo Ren, there was little hope for the survival of the Resistance. 

Rey watched as Rose sweetly kissed Finn goodbye, with tears in her eyes. Most likely, she thought she was losing him forever. That probably wasn’t far off. No one survived an encounter with Kylo Ren.  
“Leia, please think about this. There must be another way. Kylo Ren would never listen. We know him too well.”

Rey was surprised. How did Han and Leia know Kylo Ren and still be alive?

“Han, you know I wouldn’t have you three do this if there was another way.” Han nodded. Leia was stubborn, but she was right. She never risked anyone’s lives on purpose. 

“I am sending the three of you to negotiate with Kylo Ren to save the Resistance. I know that he has committed countless cruelties in the galaxy, but somewhere there is still a trace of good in him. Han and I know. He’s our son.”

Both Finn and Rey stared at Leia and Han. Kylo Ren was their son? How was that possible?

“He used to go by a different name. Ben. But he no longer uses it. That part of him is mostly gone, but I feel that there is still hope that he can come back to the light. I have had C-3PO input the coordinates of Starkiller Base into the Millennium Falcon. If you leave now, you all should be at the base by this evening. I have already received a message from Kylo Ren. He will send someone to escort you inside to have a discussion with him.”

“He has agreed to negotiate?” Rey asked, hopeful, and surprised.

“No, so far he has only agreed to meet with the three of you. I must warn you all to be careful. We all know what pain he is capable of causing.” 

The three of them nodded solemnly. Han kissed Leia goodbye. Then, Leia embraced Rey. 

“You are ready for this, Rey. You are strong in the Force, too. That could be useful in this endeavor.”

“Will he attack?” Rey asked fearfully.

“I don’t know. I knew Ben, but I don’t know Kylo Ren.”


	3. Chapter 3

Rey co-piloted the Millennium Falcon with Han Solo as General Leia watched the ship leave the hanger. It was a dangerous mission, but it was the perfect chance to prove her bravery and loyalty to the Resistance. Now she could be a hero like the rest of them. If the three of them could get Kylo Ren to negotiate. She was terrified of seeing him. He had been described as all darkness, a shadow. He wore a metal mask and his deep, mechanical voice was enough to frighten anyone.

“You all right, Solo?” Finn asked, sensing Han’s nervousness, even though Han Solo wasn’t afraid of anyone. Perhaps Kylo Ren was someone he was afraid of. It must have been so painful, losing his son to the darkness, knowing about every cruel deed his son had ever committed. But this explained why Leia felt so much sorrow when the First Order was mentioned, and it justified Han’s anger. Han Solo had lost his only son to the power of the First Order. It was no wonder he had never said anything about it. 

Soon, Starkiller Base came into view. The ground was covered in snow, something Rey had never seen before. But there was no time to admire it. She didn’t want to, anyway. Anything associated with the First Order was horrible and hideous. There was nothing beautiful or wonderful that was a part of the First Order. There never could be. How could beauty come from darkness?

Han Solo landed the ship on the base, making a large dent in the snow. The three of them exited the ship. Two stormtroopers approached them. Rey put her hand on her belt where her lightsaber was.  
“FN-2187?” FN-2189, one of the stormtroopers, asked, surprised.

“Finn. I have a name now.” Finn’s name had been given to him by Poe Dameron, one of the best pilots in the Resistance. He had given the Resistance great strength and hope, even though countless lives had been lost. But loss was just a cruel part of war. War took away, but never gave. Except to give pain and suffering. 

The stormtrooper nodded at Finn. “We are to escort you three to Commander Ren. He will see you shortly.” Everyone tensed but followed the stormtroopers inside Starkiller Base. Finn was the most nervous of them all. He hadn’t been inside the base since he was stationed there. He was sure Kylo Ren would remember him and his treason against the First Order. Why had Leia chosen this team? Between him and Han Solo, Ren was sure to refuse to negotiate. But maybe he didn’t know who he would be speaking with. Finn scoffed internally. How could Ren not know? 

“Sir,” FN-2189 saluted and reported to Kylo Ren. The Resistance representatives are here.”

Kylo Ren didn’t make eye contact. He was an imposing man (if he was a man at all) with a black, metal mask and dark black robes. Even his officers could barely look at him, they were so terrified. It was worse to upset him than to look at him, though. He was strong in the Force and had been taught to embrace the power of the dark side by his master, Supreme Leader Snoke. He owed the Supreme Leader his undying loyalty for taking him in so generously and at such a young age. He had only been ten at the time. Most had questioned the Supreme Leader’s choice, but not out loud. The Supreme Leader was wise and always right. And never questioned. 

“I sense Han Solo and FN-2187. But who is the third?” Ren asked curiously.

“The two are accompanied by a girl.” FN-2189 reported. Kylo Ren turned around angrily before proceeding to slash some of the monitors in the room with his red lightsaber. His lightsaber was of an ancient design, with cross guards. Only a master in the Force could wield such an unstable saber. After a few more slashes, Ren deactivated his lightsaber. 

“What girl?” He had calmed slightly, but there was still anger within him. He could sense her now and it made him nervous. Who was she? At the same time, he felt a small amount of hope. He wasn’t sure why. 

Han, Finn, and Rey waited for Kylo Ren in a conference room on the base. It had been nearly a half an hour, but the stormtrooper who had escorted them in had come back, saying that the Commander would arrive shortly. Rey’s hand went nervously to her lightsaber on her belt. She had briefly gone away to train with Luke Skywalker for a few months during her time with the Resistance. The lightsaber he had given her to use was green. She was supposed to build her own lightsaber, but Master Luke had died before the process could be started. General Leia missed him severely, and Rey knew that she thought of him often. That was Rey’s dominant Force skill, sensing emotions and being able to read the thoughts of others. She tried not to do it too often, but when someone was experiencing a lot of pain or sorrow, she couldn’t help it. She felt the need to try and comfort someone if it was within her capacity to do so. She was sure that her skill couldn’t help them now. 

Suddenly, the doors slid open. The three of them turned around. Kylo Ren. He was just like everyone had said. A monster in a mask. He walked up to them, but looked at Rey the closest, as if sensing something different about her? Could he sense her Force Sensitivity? Ren looked at her for several minutes before stepping away again. 

“Han Solo, I did not expect to see you. Imagine my surprise.” But his voice indicated that he was anything but surprised. Most likely, he had expected to see him. Nothing surprised Kylo Ren anymore.  
“Imagine my surprise, Ben, when I learned my son was learning to be a Sith lord.”

“Do not use that name again. Ben Solo is dead, only Kylo Ren lives, for he is stronger. Ben Solo was weak, and I killed him.”

Han seemed as if he wanted to say something but didn’t. He knew how much the Resistance needed this negotiation. Trying to talk to Ren as his son was pointless. What was Leia thinking? He would not turn. There was too much of his grandfather in him. Darth Vader had been ruthless and cruel, more than Ren ever could be. But Ren wanted the darkness more, Vader had allowed himself to be redeemed by Luke. If only Luke was still with them. But he was one with the Force now. 

Kylo Ren walked in front of Finn, looking at him. But said nothing. Then he looked at the girl again. She wasn’t much to look at. Her scavenger clothes, although they were of a nicer quality, were still scavenger clothes. Even though she wasn’t beautiful, there was something about her that was attractive to him. What was it? 

“You are here because you want me to negotiate with the Resistance?” Kylo Ren addressed Finn, who nervously stammered, “Yes.”

“I will negotiate and perhaps spare the Resistance on one condition.” Han, Finn, and Rey shared secret celebratory looks. The Resistance would be spared! 

“If,” Ren began, “she stays with me here at Starkiller Base.” Ren’s voice had grown dark and cold as he looked at Rey. 

“Rey? You want us to agree to leave her behind?” Han Solo was shocked. How could Kylo Ren ask such a thing? Rey was family, they couldn’t leave her. 

Rey. The name seemed fitting for the girl. She radiated light and goodness. It made him curious, but at the same time he wanted to run out of the room. What was taking so long to agree to his condition? She was just a girl. How could someone like her be so important to the Resistance? 

“Isn’t there anything else you want?” Han tried, desperate to save Rey. But Ren could sense that. And it angered him greatly and sparked jealousy within him. All the more reason to keep the girl. 

“Interesting how you never cared about your own son, but you care about some scavenger. “Ren was offended and hurt by his father’s actions but refused to show it. Why was this girl so important to him?

Han started to say something, but Rey stepped forward and looked directly at Kylo Ren. “Agreed. I will stay here in order to save the Resistance.” Han started to object, but Rey shook her head. She was resigned to this, it was her destiny. This was how she could become a hero. 

“It’s that important to you?” Ren never could have anticipated such fierce loyalty from her. She had seemed so quiet. Maybe she could be persuaded to join the First Order. To join him. 

“Yes.” Rey answered, but said nothing else. She hadn’t expected this. Now she would lose the only home and the only family that she had ever known. What did Kylo Ren want with her? He had never been known for being kind. Something was wrong. 

As Han and Finn were led away, Kylo Ren turned towards her. “Follow me.” She could have been hearing things, but it sounded like his voice had cracked slightly. As if he had regrets. Impossible. Kylo Ren never regretted anything. 


	4. Chapter 4

Rey followed Kylo Ren through the dark corridors on Starkiller Base. As he passed, she noticed how everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at him in dread and fear. Kylo Ren was silent. Did he take pleasure from their fear? He probably already knew that she was afraid of him. He did sense her fear, but for once, he wasn’t glad of it.

After they had left the bridge, Kylo Ren looked back towards Rey. As he stared at her, he noticed tears slide down her cheek. But she wiped it away quickly. It seemed like she was trying hard to hide her emotions from him. Foolish girl. As if he couldn’t sense it. Still, he did have to commend her somewhat for her attempted bravery. Maybe she thought that she was a hero now? It was obvious that her heart was broken, and she was frightened. Another thought disturbed him. What was her connection to his father? He would have to read her mind later. 

Rey continued to follow Kylo Ren. Eventually, they came to a stop in front of a gray door. Kylo Ren pressed a button on the panel and the door opened. Rey’s eyes widened when they went inside. She had never seen a room so grand. Even on the Resistance base, there was nothing this grand and luxurious. Were these his rooms? She hoped not. That wasn’t what she had agreed to. As they went in, he tapped another panel. 

“These are your rooms. Mine are on the other side. You will be here forever. Might as well get used to it.” He said all of this as if it was all so normal and casual. But it wasn’t. There wasn’t anything normal about this situation. It was even more frightening knowing she was so close to his personal rooms. 

“While you’re here, there are rules that you will need to be aware of.” His voice was now commanding again, as if he were speaking to one of his officers. 

“I can’t imagine.” Rey scoffed, forgetting that maybe now wasn’t the right moment to anger him. When she looked at him, he didn’t seem angry, but it was hard to tell what he was feeling behind that mask. Why did he have it? 

Ren was stunned for a little bit. Beneath the mask, he smiled slightly. But Rey couldn’t see that. Most likely she thought that he was without all emotions except cruelty and indifference. It had been a long time since anyone had been sarcastic with him. Not since…No. He couldn’t think about any of that now. Not ever again. 

“Why are your rooms so close to mine?” Rey didn’t really want to know, but she had to ask. 

“Someone has to keep an eye on you.” He attempted to calm his voice, but it still came out slightly nervous. He didn’t want to admit that he found her attractive. He knew that she could never feel that way for him. Underneath the mask, there was nothing about himself that he liked. Not that he ever had. Even before he was Kylo Ren, he had always hated himself. 

“The rules,” he continued, steering the conversation away from any more awkward topics, “include not leaving Starkiller Base and not entering my personal rooms. I would rather keep us both on separate sides. Do you give me your word you will stay forever and follow my rules?”

Rey felt a rush of relief when he said that she was to stay away from his room. She would gladly do so. Thank goodness it hadn’t been what she thought it was. 

“Yes, Lord Ren, I agree to your terms.”

“Call me Kylo.” His voice seemed softer, then he strode out of the room, leaving her completely alone. 

“For a second, I thought he was never going to leave.” Rey heard a voice coming from the living room. 

“You two share the same name. You’d think you’d like each other better.” There was another voice, but it sounded younger and more playful. 

Rey gasped in surprise. When she entered the living room, there were two blue ghosts sitting on the couch talking with each other.

“Force ghosts.” She whispered softly, stunned. She had never seen a Force ghost before. Luke had said she needed to train more before she would ever see one. Maybe he had been wrong.  
The two ghosts looked up when they heard Rey. 

“Who are you?” She wasn’t sure if they could speak to her directly. Maybe they only spoke to each other. 

“I am Obi-Wan Kenobi, and this is Anakin.” Obi-Wan spoke very seriously and Anakin offered a cheerful grin. Rey smiled back. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Rey.” Rey stopped smiling. 

“How do you know my name?”

“It would have been hard to miss that exchange between you and my grandson earlier.” Anakin remarked, as if he wanted to laugh at something about that situation. He had never seen anyone face his grandson so bravely before. 

“You mean the deal we made?” Anakin was no longer grinning. 

“Yeah, that one.” He coughed. Indirectly, he had meant that. “Exactly what I meant, right Obi-Wan?” Obi-Wan only shook his head in disbelief. Even after his death, Anakin was still very much his playful Padawan. But he was so much more than a Padawan learner now. Anakin had grown past his mistakes. He had the heart of a true Jedi now. But thanks to Ren, the Jedi were no more. And with Luke gone, there was no longer any hope for Jedi to ever exist again. 

Suddenly, Anakin looked up. “Aren’t we missing someone?” Obi-Wan turned around and another force ghost appeared. 

“I’m sorry I’m late. I’m still not used to this.” The new ghost was a beautiful woman, not very young, but not seeming old either. She seemed about Anakin’s age. Anakin went up to her and kissed her, while Obi-Wan coughed slightly. Anakin smiled sheepishly. 

“Rey, this is my wife, Padme.” Anakin smiled as he introduced her. Rey could sense their love for each other radiating off of them. She had never felt an emotion so strong and powerful. It must be true love. 

“It’s nice to meet you.” Rey said, still shocked that she was in the presence of Force Ghosts. Still, any company would be nice. And ghosts would be around forever. 

“I’m sorry that you have to be involved in all of this, but it is your destiny.” Padme looked at Rey. She wasn’t Force sensitive, but she could tell that Rey was. Years of being married to a Jedi had that effect. 

“Are you Anakin Skywalker?” Rey asked. Anakin looked nervous and slightly embarrassed.

“You’ve heard of me?”

“Master Luke used to talk about you. I think it’s incredible what you did for him. He’s never forgotten it.”

“Luke truly saved me. Without him, I wouldn’t have my family and friends back. Padme wouldn’t be here either if Luke hadn’t saved me.” Anakin smiled at his wife warmly, then noticed Rey’s fallen look.  
“What is it, dear?” Padme asked gently, knowing something was greatly troubling the young woman. 

“I lost all of my family and friends through this. Kylo Ren took everything from me. Han and Leia might not have been my true relatives, but they were the closest thing to a family I’ve ever known and now they’re gone.” Rey couldn’t hold in her emotions in anymore. Tears slipped from her eyes and down her cheeks and they wouldn’t stop flowing. Despite being a ghost, Padme held her gently and Rey felt strangely comforted. 

“It’ll be alright, dear. You’ll see. You have to look ahead of you, not behind.” Anakin and Obi-Wan nodded in agreement. Looking to the past had never gotten anyone anywhere. Anakin remembered his own past more vividly than anyone. It was hard to forget being Darth Vader and he was stuck always remembering since all his grandson ever did was idolize everything he’d ever done wrong. The mask was just dramatic, though. Just like he was. They were more alike than he wanted to admit.

When Rey woke up, she was in her new room in Kylo Ren’s suites. She must have fallen asleep while crying. It had just been so comforting to be around Padme, and Obi-Wan and Anakin were certainly amusing. But who had carried her to her room?

Kylo Ren sat in the living room, holding his mask in his hands. He heard Rey’s door open and immediately put it back on. She already hated him. She’d hate him more if he kept his mask off. He stood when she entered the room. When he saw her, it reminded him that he had carried her into her room after she had fallen asleep in the living room. He didn’t want her to know, though. Imagine, the fearsome Kylo Ren carrying a girl. She’d never believe it anyway. 

When Rey entered the living room, she was startled to see Kylo Ren. But did she really expect him to announce himself? He was the Commander of the First Order. He could do whatever he wanted. She wished that the Force ghosts were still here, though. She missed them already. Besides Kylo Ren, they were her only company. But unlike Ren, they were her friends and actually cared about her. He was her enemy and she hated him with everything in her. 

“You look as if you’re trying to solve something,” He mused. She was obviously trying to figure out something. But Rey said nothing. 

“I might as well listen to your question. I can’t promise I’ll answer it.”

“Why am I here?”

“You’re my guest. And don’t say you’re not. I assure you, prisoners are not allowed to stay in rooms like this.” His deep voice answered her. But it wasn’t really an answer.

“Just because you gave me a nice room doesn’t mean I’m not a prisoner. I can never leave, remember?” Rey said angrily. A guest indeed! She was sure that he’d never entertained a guest in his life.

“How could I forget? But enough of this. It is time for dinner.” He started to walk out of the room, expecting Rey to follow him. 

“Not interested.” Ren stopped suddenly and turned to face her. She glared at him. 

“What did you say?” He was angry now, his voice menacing.

“You heard me.” Rey tried to be calm, but her voice shook. She’d never spoken to anyone like this before. But years on Jakku had helped sharpen her wit and develop sarcasm. She just hadn’t had any recent occasions to use it. Until now. She would need all her skills to survive living here with Kylo Ren. 

“You dare refuse me?” He was furious now. No one had ever refused him before.

“You’re not my master. I am not one of your stormtroopers or officers to be ordered around.”

Anakin and Obi-Wan watched Rey and Kylo with interest from the back of the room. Rey didn’t notice them and Kylo couldn’t see them. 

“Didn’t foresee someone like her, did you, Master?” Anakin said, addressing Obi-Wan, and clearly amused by the current situation. 

“She certainly is stronger than we thought. Perhaps she could be the one to turn him.” Obi-Wan remarked.

“Or the one to set off his rage. I haven’t seen him this mad in a while.” Anakin was no longer grinning. He was worried for Rey now. Kylo Ren’s temper had always been dangerous. Rey didn’t know what she was getting herself into. 

“You made a deal with me, scavenger. I am in charge and you are not. I would suggest you do what I say.” Ren was even more frightening and menacing now, but Rey didn’t back down. She had had enough of his orders. 

“You will never be in charge of me. Ever! And as I said, I’m not interested in going to dinner with you. Not now, not ever.”

“Then go ahead and STARVE! I don’t care! Either have dinner with me or not at all!” Ren stormed out breaking several things on his way out, including a delicate and expensive black vase.

“I liked that vase.” Anakin muttered. Obi-Wan only looked at him. Was that all that he was thinking about?

“Are you alright, Rey?” Obi-Wan asked. 

“I’m fine. I can’t believe he thought that he had control over me.”

“In a way, he does. But you were right, you can make your own choices, too. You are stronger than you know, Rey.”

After fighting with Rey, Kylo Ren didn’t have much of an appetite anymore. One of his officers arrived with a summons from the Supreme Leader. Ren went off without a word to their meeting room.  
“Ren, you are late.” The Supreme Leader, an ancient being with withered skin and the face of death itself, spoke, or at least, a hologram of him did. 

“My deepest apologies, Supreme Leader.” Kylo Ren bowed before Snoke, his master. At least Ren knew his place. If only Rey knew what the word master meant. She clearly had no regard for his status. Why couldn’t she just do what she was told?

“I see you have the girl. Excellent. She is as strong as I thought she would be. But she still needs training. I leave that task to you.”

“Yes, Supreme Leader. She is strong with the Force, untrained but stronger than she knows. But she will know.”

“There is something that is unsettling, though. I sense that you may feel something towards her. You have compassion for her.” Snoke’s voice dripped with disdain.

“No, never. Compassion? For an enemy of the Order? I would never betray you so, Supreme Leader.”

“I should hope not, Ren. You know what happens when you fail me.” 

Ren knew alright. Ever since he was a young boy, he had been punished for falling short of the darkness that he seeked to command. But Snoke had only been trying to teach him the true ways of the Sith. Kylo Ren could not afford to be weak. Not when he had been handpicked by the Supreme Leader to be his apprentice. 

“She means nothing to me.”

“Are you sure?” Snoke asked curiously, not quite believing Ren. 

“By the grace of your training, I will not be seduced.” 

“Do not disappoint me, Ren. The First Order cannot afford anymore mistakes.” Snoke’s last words echoed before the hologram faded out. 

After Snoke had disappeared, Kylo Ren stood in the room alone. He was still on one knee with his head bowed. “Forgive me. I feel it again, the pull to the light. Supreme Leader senses it. Show me again the power of the darkness, and I will let nothing stand in our way. Show me Grandfather, and I will finish what you started.”

Anakin appeared in the room and shook his head in sadness. “No Ben, you need the light. You need to fix the mess I made. The First Order shouldn’t even exist. This is all my fault.” Anakin knew that Kylo couldn’t hear him, but he hoped that some part of him understood. They couldn’t let the darkness in anymore. If only Ben could return to the light. It would change everything. Maybe with Rey here there was a chance. Anakin wasn’t blind to his grandson’s emotions. He knew that he felt something for Rey. Rey was at least intrigued by him, but she definitely wasn’t attracted to him. Not yet anyway. If only there was something he could do. But he was only a projection of the Force, nothing more. There was no humanity left in him, or the others. And no one could be free to be one with the Force until Kylo Ren no longer needed them. Especially him. 


	5. Chapter 5

After Obi-Wan disappeared, Rey thought about what he had said. How could she be strong? Sure, she was strong in the Force, but she wasn’t exactly brave. She wanted to be though, maybe with her sacrifice, she would finally be a Resistance hero. It was all she wanted. A chance to prove that she was someone special. But she would never know. Forever with Kylo Ren was a long time. If he thought that she would change her mind because of his threat, he was wrong. Before coming to the Resistance, she had never eaten well, and she had hardly ever had enough to eat. She was used to starving. She could survive. There was more to her than Kylo would ever be able to understand.

Kylo Ren still wasn’t back yet. She may not have wanted to eat dinner with him, but she was slightly hungry. She just had to avoid thinking about it. Suddenly, she heard a door open. Ren was back already? She walked nervously into the living room but saw Anakin instead of Kylo Ren. She sighed in relief. She didn’t want to see Kylo now, or ever. But she knew that he would come back eventually. 

“Thought you might be hungry.” He handed her some bread, cheese and fruit.

“It’s not much, but I had already scared some of the officers with the floating food. I couldn’t take any more risks.”

“Thank you,” said Rey, smiling in gratitude. These Force ghosts were probably the only ones on the base capable of kindness. 

“Anakin, there you are! I’ve been looking for you for a while. Where were you?” Obi-Wan called out. 

“With Ren.”

Both Obi-Wan and Rey looked up at him. 

“What the blazes were you doing with him?”

“He sort of called to me. Or at least thought he was talking to me.”

“Did you say anything back?” 

“Yes, but he didn’t hear me. Even if he could hear me, he still wouldn’t listen. There’s too much of me within him. I’m sorry, I’ve doomed us all.”

“It’s not your fault, Ani.” Padme appeared and wrapped her arms around him. He smiled a little at her old nickname for him. After all he’d done, he was lucky to have her back. What would he do without her? 

Padme sat next to Rey and looked at the food Anakin had brought her. “Let me guess. He ordered you to have dinner with and you refused.” 

“How did you know I refused?”

“It’s what I would have done. You and are both strong in our own way. We’re a lot alike. Leia used to have that same strength, but she seems so burdened and worn down lately. That was a very brave thing that you did, for everyone.”

“Even though it cost me everything? Everyone I loved?”

“Love is still ahead of you, Rey. It’s not lost forever.”

“What do you mean?”

Padme didn’t answer her question. “It’s late, perhaps it’s time we all went to bed.”

Suddenly, Rey noticed a faint, blue glow coming from Kylo Ren’s room. Anakin, Padme, and Obi-Wan noticed it too, but didn’t want to draw attention to it. If Rey went near it, it would only mean danger for her. Especially since Ren had told her not to go into his room. 

“What is that?” Rey asked curiously, starting to walk towards the blue light. Anakin quickly stepped in front of her. 

“It’s nothing to concern yourself with. Who cares about Force lights?” Obi-Wan did a face-palm gesture and Anakin tried to change the subject, but Rey interrupted. 

“There’s a Force light in there? That means it’s calling to me.” Rey was mesmerized. Luke had told her about Force lights. They were very powerful. They could show you your future. Your destiny. Maybe it would give her hope. 

“Just because something calls to you doesn’t mean you have to answer it.” Anakin insisted, remembering how the Dark Side had called to him. Obi-Wan nodded in agreement. 

“I have to know. I’m sorry. I need to see what it has to show me.” Rey opened the door to Kylo’s room. It was much darker than hers. All the bedding was black. Most things in the room were broken, most likely he had slashed those things with his lightsaber. Not surprising since Ren was known for his tempers. As she went further into the room, she saw a wooden box emitting a blue glow. That must be the Force light. She continued to walk towards the box, feeling a strong pull towards it. She was being drawn in. Her eyes glowed with the blue of the Force light. Slowly, she opened the box. Inside was a lightsaber. She reached out her hand and touched it. 

Suddenly, Rey was no longer in Ren’s room. She was in a dark room with a blue glow. There were shadows everywhere. In the room, she heard different voices from over the years. 

“Bring balance to the Force.”

“Its energy…surrounds us…”

“No!”

“and binds us…”

She heard her own voice from when she was a young girl. “No, come back!”

“Rey.” She didn’t recognize that voice, yet something about it seemed familiar. It was soft and gentle, loving. Why did it feel like she had heard that voice somewhere before? 

“These are your first steps.” The last voice sounded like Obi-Wan. 

As quickly as it had come, the vision ended. “Master Obi-Wan?” Rey called out. Rey turned around and saw Kylo Ren. She was still holding the lightsaber. Its blue crystal created a light shadow in the room. Light against the darkness. 

“It is you.” Kylo spoke so softly that she almost didn’t hear him. For a moment, he looked at her, stunned. 

“What are you doing here? Why did you go near that?” His deep, metallic voice echoed in the room. 

“I’m sorry. I saw a light. I had to follow it.” Rey’s voice shook.

If the Force called to her, then that means she’s important. How? She’s just a scavenger. “You had no right. You promised not to come here!” He shouted, using his lightsaber to slash some of the furniture around them. He advanced towards her. 

“I told you I was the master here. You should have listened. You know I can take whatever I want.” Rey could sense the anger coming off of him, but he was slightly calmer than he had been a minute ago. Still fearful of him, her eyes widened. 

He brought his lightsaber closer. “I could take your life, right now.” He started to bring the lightsaber down towards her, but something held him back. A voice was calling out to him. 

“Ben, don’t!” Anakin called out. He couldn’t let Kylo kill Rey. There would be no hope left if he did. 

“Rey, run!” Obi-Wan called out. Kylo Ren had turned around looking for the voice. It had been just enough time for Rey to duck under his lightsaber and run out the door. Kylo Ren turned around just in time to see her running away. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. 

“Ben?” Anakin stood looking at him. For the first time, Ren could see him too. 

“Grandfather?” He stood shocked. How long had his grandfather been there? How much had he seen? 

“You must go after her. She could die.”

“She betrayed me! She deserves to die!” Ren shouted, but part of him didn’t mean it. He didn’t want to see her die. For some reason, he was drawn to her. He wanted to see where the connection went. If anywhere. 

“The Force called to her. It has a plan for the two of you. I don’t know what it is, but you have unbalanced the Force enough. It is time to make it right.”

“But Grandfather…”

“Ben, GO!” Anakin shouted, not wanting to argue anymore. Kylo Ren ran out of the room after Rey. The snow wolves would be out by now. He had to hurry or it would be too late. Wolves weren’t known for sparing anyone. 

Rey ran through the forests on Starkiller Base. She had to find a ship. She had to get out of here. Promise or no promise, Ren was and always would be a monster. She wasn’t safe with him. He had almost killed her. Suddenly, she heard the loud howl of wolves echoing through the forest. They were getting closer. She had to hurry. 

Kylo ran through the forest, trying to sense Rey’s presence. Suddenly, he saw her. And the pack of wolves coming towards her. 

“Rey!” He called out. She turned towards him and the two of them looked at each other. There was fear in her eyes, whether it was of him or the wolves he wasn’t sure. A wolf started to run towards Rey and Kylo ran in front of it. He continued to fight the wolves with his lightsaber, but they weren’t easily killed. They attacked him back, their teeth tearing at his cloak and sinking into his flesh. Eventually the wolves ran off, and he collapsed into the snow. There wasn’t much of his helmet left. His left cheek had been slashed by the claws of some of the wolves. Rey stood in shock as she looked at Kylo Ren’s weak form in the snow. He had just saved her life. She had to help him back to his room. No one deserved to die, not even Ren. She surprised herself at the thought. But she wasn’t the type of person that would just let someone die out of spite. If she did, she would be a monster too. 

“You have to help me. You have to stand.” She held out her hand and Kylo looked at it, startled, then he nodded in agreement. He reached for her hand and leaned on Rey as they walked back to his room. They made it back to his room and Rey helped him to his bed. A bowl with hot water and cloth had been placed on the nightstand, as well as a medical sewing kit. Probably from Padme. It seemed like something she would do. 

Rey noticed that Ren’s side was bleeding and his shoulder was badly scraped. Since she was the only one able to take care of him, she would have to ask him something personal. Two things actually. She blushed. Of all the things to ever ask Kylo Ren. He was probably just as monstrous underneath the mask. 

Kylo noticed this, of course. He knew what he had to do. Slowly and painfully he removed his shirt. He saw Rey look away. Maybe there was a part of her that was attracted to him. Not much, but something. At least, underneath, he wasn’t so bad. 

“There’s one more thing. I’m sorry, but I’m going to need you to remove your helmet.”

“Fine.” He muttered, not sure if he cared or not. A thought struck him. Now she would truly fear him. Ren pressed the release and gently removed the helmet. She gasped softly, startled. He wasn’t what she had expected at all. Kylo Ren definitely was not hideous, like everyone claimed. He was actually very handsome. Even with the slash down his cheek. He had soft, brown eyes and curly, black hair. He definitely had Leia’s eyes. Was that why he had hidden them? Had it been too much of a reminder of when he had been Ben Solo?

“I know. It’s horrible.” He had meant his soul, not his appearance. But she didn’t know that. 

“It’s not, actually. You’re not what I thought.” Rey gave him a soft smile, but he smirked back. 

“Should I be concerned that you haven’t said anything about my chest? Or even noticed it, I might add. The injuries, I mean.” He smirked, knowing that he would embarrass her. He could read her thoughts very clearly in that moment. He definitely hadn’t meant the injuries. He knew how bad those were. Now he was monstrous inside and out. 

“I noticed.” Rey said, then blushed. Kylo did smile back, a somewhat flirtations grin. Rey finished wrapping his wounds and stitching his cheek, then stood up to leave. He held her wrist gently to stop her from leaving. His first gentle touch in years. 

“Rey, I’m sorry for what happened earlier. Thank you for fixing my injuries. You didn’t have to.” Kylo said softly. Now that his mask was gone, his emotions were clear to see.  
“I know. You’re welcome, Kylo.” He released her wrist, then smiled softly as she left. Within moments, he had drifted off to sleep. 


	6. Chapter 6

“Well, that was certainly an unexpected change. I guess you got through to him.” Obi-Wan smiled at Anakin, proud of his former apprentice. 

“I knew I would eventually. I just wish he’d listened sooner.” Anakin smiled, but seemed weary. It had taken a lot of effort to communicate with his grandson. But it had been worth it. 

“Hopefully he’ll keep listening to us.” Padme sighed. It would be difficult for Kylo Ren to return to the light, but he just had to. There was no other option anymore. Maybe, with Rey, he could finally find a reason to become Ben Solo again. She knew that her daughter and son-in-law missed him, more than either of them would ever admit. Stubbornness clearly ran in the family. 

“We’ll see, Padme.” Anakin held her hand gently. “Now there’s finally hope.” 

Kylo Ren was restless through the night. He kept dreaming of Rey and what had happened in the forest. How could he have ever thought that she deserved to die? He was the one that deserved to die, not someone as kind and gentle as her. He had to apologize. Something he hadn’t done in years. Something unheard of for a master of the Knights of Ren. 

On Rey’s side of the suites, she was just as restless. She had been so close to being killed by the wolves. Why had Ren saved her? She had saved him because it seemed like the right thing to do. She had too many questions and not enough answers. She was still wondering about the lightsaber, too. Why had it called to her if it was his? But why would he have two? His red saber was clearly a Sith saber, but the blue one was a Jedi lightsaber. Maybe he had stolen it from someone? Or maybe it belongs to Ben Solo. 

When Rey woke up, she decided to take a walk. No one seemed to notice her as she walked through Starkiller Base towards the outside. Suddenly, a small, black and grey droid rolled in front of her. It looked like a darker, more frightening version of BB-8. Suddenly, he whirred in reprimanding way. It didn’t seem very friendly. 

“I’m not trying to escape!” Rey defended, understanding the droid’s sounds, much to its surprise. 

“The droid whirred again. Its chirps grew louder. A few stormtroopers stopped and started to stare at her and the droid. She glared back, and they looked away and continued on.  
“Am I such a prisoner that I can’t even take a walk outside? If I was trying to escape, I wouldn’t let a droid like you stand in my way.” Rey started to walk forwards towards the door.  
An electrical instrument came out of the droid and it zapped her sharply in the leg.

“Ow! What was that for?” Rey exclaimed, then glared angrily at the droid. 

The droid chirped irritatingly. “Not too be trusted? Well, how would you know?”

“BB-9E, that’s enough.” Kylo Ren’s deep voice spoke. He walked toward Rey. She wasn’t as frightened of him, especially since his mask was gone. It must have been destroyed last night. Probably beyond repair, since he wasn’t wearing it now. 

“I hope he didn’t injure you too severely.” Ren said. 

“Actually, he did. Your droid shocked me.”

“He must have thought you were trying to escape.” Ren said, as if that explained everything, while stifling a laugh at the same time. He hadn’t almost laughed at something in years. Why did this girl have such a powerful effect on him? What was it about her that made him want her so much?

“I wasn’t. I just wanted to take a walk outside. But your droid won’t let me.”

BB-9E made another series of high-pitched chirps. Even Ren had to place his hands over his ears. 

 

“I asked her to take a walk with me. She already has clearance. Next time, control your temper. And check the records.” Rey watched the exchange between master and droid. The droid dipped its head slowly and Ren nodded. There were no records, of course. But no one ever questioned him. 

“Shall we?” He held out his arm and Rey reluctantly took it. The two of them stepped outside with BB-9E watching curiously. 

“Sorry about that. He’s used to being in charge of security and he takes offense easily.”

“A droid is in charge of security? Isn’t that a little unreliable?” Rey questioned. BB-8, the droid at the Resistance, was similar to BB-9E, but he would never have been in charge of security.  
“No one’s ever gotten past my droid. That shock you received was minor, compared to what else he can do.”

Rey shivered a little, attributing it to the cold, but Ren noticed. Even he had to admit that his droid could be frightening. He didn’t say anything, though. Besides, it wasn’t like he had a cloak to offer her or anything. He thought for a moment. He sort of did. 

“Here.” Ren removed his cloak and gave it to Rey. “Wouldn’t want you to freeze to death out here.” He muttered, trying to hide his slight concern. 

“Thanks.” Rey accepted the cloak and smiled at him slightly before looking away again. It looked good on her, actually. Black brought out her eyes more. She had hazel eyes. He hadn’t noticed before. Rey had let go of his hand by now, he missed holding it. 

“Will your droid injure me when it sees me again?”

“He, actually. And, no. He knows that you’re with me. You’re his master now, too. Or mistress, I guess.”

Rey wasn’t sure how she felt about that. What relationship did the droid think she had with Kylo Ren? 

“In what way does he think we’re together?” Rey asked nervously. Kylo Ren wasn’t looking at her. 

“The same as everyone else. We’re engaged.” 

It felt as if her heart stopped suddenly. At the same time, the prospect of being engaged to him didn’t sound completely horrible. What was wrong with her? Or with him?

“Didn’t you wonder why no one questioned that you’re staying with me in my suite?” Ren asked if as it was obvious, but the thought hadn’t even crossed Rey’s mind. She had just assumed that no one ever questioned the Commander or his decisions. 

“You said yes to staying with me.” 

“I didn’t say yes to marrying you. Or was that part of the agreement to not attack the Resistance?”

“Yes, I meant to tell you sooner. It just kind of slipped my mind.” He admitted, slightly embarrassed. He had never forgotten to give someone information before. Even though this was much more than typical operational information. 

“Did you know I was coming?”

“No. It was just something I thought of at the last minute. Otherwise, you won’t be protected on this ship. It would be much more dangerous for you.”

“You did it to protect me?” Rey was surprised. He had felt that way when they met. What did that mean?

“You don’t seem as angry.” He seemed suspicious of her reaction. He had expected her to be significantly angrier with him, especially since he hadn’t asked. 

“I appreciate why you did it. I can’t say I understand.”

“Of course not. Why would Kylo Ren ever be engaged? I’m too much of a monster for that.”

“I didn’t say you were a monster.” Rey defended. 

“Not directly to me, no. But I am. I know it, everyone knows it. It’s obvious.”

“Still, I don’t see why you would say no. You don’t know everything about me.” He was starting to grow irritated now. Would she really reject him after what he’d just done? He had saved her, after all. That should count for something. 

“I know everything I need to know about you! How could I ever consider marrying someone like you? You’re the cruelest person in the entire galaxy. No wonder your droid is so frightening. He must have learned that from you.” Rey turned away from him angrily and started to walk away. The nerve, to think that I would ever want to marry him! 

“We’re not done yet.” Kylo called out, knowing she didn’t want to listen to him. Fortunately for him, there wasn’t anywhere else she could go at the moment. The forest only went so far. 

“Oh, you have more to say? I can’t imagine what else. Are we getting married tomorrow? I can hardly wait.” Rey scoffed, not wanting to marry him at all. But apparently, she had agreed, and to save the Resistance, she would do anything. He had known that and taken advantage of her weakness. How typical. 

“Yes. I’m sorry.” Ren said slowly. And he actually did feel sorry for once. He was forcing her decision, as his decision to join the Dark Side had been forced. But he didn’t regret it. He was stronger now then Ben could have ever been. He was rich, powerful, and had everything that he had ever wanted. Yet it wasn’t enough. Nothing was ever enough for him. 

“What could you possibly be sorry for?” 

“That you’re stuck with me. I should have been clearer in what I meant when I asked you to stay with me forever.”

“More like demanded. You knew that no matter what you said, I would agree. That’s blackmail.”

“At least let me make it up to you. And I wanted to start off by apologizing for last night. I shouldn’t have lost my temper like that. It was unfair to you.”  
Rey looked at him, surprised. 

“You at least owe me the chance to answer your question. I will never be proposed to again. You took that away from me, along with everything and everyone else that was important to me.”

“Of all the things I could give you, that’s what you want?” Ren was surprised, but it made sense. Once she married him, no one would ever propose to her. He at least owed her a decent one. 

“I don’t have the ring.”

“Would you have had it if you’d asked me in the conference room?”

“No.”  
“Then it doesn’t matter.” Rey’s voice was distant, and she wasn’t looking at him. He couldn’t blame her. 

Kylo sighed. If only she had asked for something else. Anything else. He probably wouldn’t be able to give her a half way decent proposal. She would be stuck seeing his face for the rest of their lives. He had never expected her to want him to propose, so he was nervous as if he had actually meant it. He almost did. 

“Rey, will you marry me and spend forever with me?” He had knelt down on one knee, just as with a traditional proposal. This was anything but traditional, though. Without his helmet, she was looking at his true face. She could see the emotions in his eyes. His conflict, his uncertainty. His voice was soft now, almost pleading. He knew that she had to say yes, but he expected her to say no, even if it didn’t matter. It should though. It should have been her choice all along. 

“Yes, Commander Ren. I will marry you and agree to forever.” Rey had trouble getting the words out. She wanted to say no, just to make her point. That she should have been able to choose. But it wouldn’t have mattered anyway.

He had wanted her to call him Kylo but understood why she hadn’t. To her, this was just another part of his job. Maybe she just needed to warm up to him. Too bad they would only have a day to attempt to get to know each other and spend some time together, and an hour of it had been wasted arguing with his security droid. 

“We could at least spend the rest of the day together.” He suggested, hopefully. 

“I guess. We’re stuck together now.” He could tell that Rey was less than thrilled about this, but he hoped that he could change her mind a little. Now that his mask was gone, she would be able to see the emotions in his eyes. She was practically looking at his soul, and it frightened him. No one else knew that there was any humanity left in him. 

“Don’t be afraid, I feel it too. I promise, Rey. I won’t hurt you.”

“You almost killed me last night. Forgive me for not believing you.” He supposed that he couldn’t blame her. Just because he had saved her didn’t mean that she automatically trusted him. No one trusted him. 

“I made a mistake last night. I don’t want to kill you.”

Rey sighed, but made no further argument. The two of them walked in silence for a while, the only sound being the snow crunching underneath their boots. 

When they reached the entrance to the forest, Rey stopped. 

“I think I’m ready to turn back.” Rey remembered the previous night and tried to hide her fear and her uncertainty. When Ren had rescued her, she had felt safe for a moment. But how could she ever feel safe with a creature like him? 

Kylo looked at the forest, then back at Rey. “Of course.” He held out his arm again and Rey took it as the two of the walked back towards the base. 

Rey had stayed in her room the rest of the day. And nothing Kylo could say would make her open the door. She knew that he could force it open, but he didn’t want to do that. He was forcing her into enough as it was. 

Rey cried in her room while Padme sat with Anakin on a couch nearby. 

“Of all the things I expected him to do, this wasn’t one of them.”

“We couldn’t have seen this coming. I wish that he had thought this through more.” Anakin said, once again disappointed in Kylo. When he had married Padme, it had been because he loved her and because she loved him back. Whatever Kylo felt for Rey, it wasn’t love, not yet anyway. But he wasn’t sure it could be if he continued on in this way. He knew Kylo had tried to talk to Rey, but what made him think she would want to talk to him after that. He had been in the forest when Kylo announced that they were engaged. Someone had to watch over Rey. He wasn’t doing a good enough job, though. Once again, he had failed at protecting someone he cared about. Anakin hadn’t known Rey long, but he knew she had a good heart. He hoped the Force knew what it was doing with those two. 

Several hours later, there was a knock on the door. 

“Kylo, I told you to leave me alone!” Rey yelled, but the door opened anyway. He didn’t enter, though. He just stood in the living room, a box in his hand. Knowing she couldn’t avoid him forever, Rey left her room. 

“I have something for you. It’s for tomorrow.” He held out the box and she took it. When she opened it, she saw a white, lace gown inside. 

“It was my grandmother’s. Only gown on the ship besides the ones in your closet.”

“Why do you have your grandmother’s wedding gown?”

“My mother gave it to me. For that day.” He looked away, knowing Leia hadn’t meant a forced wedding. She had wanted it to be used for a real wedding, for someone he was in love with. But he couldn’t deny that he felt something for Rey. It wasn’t love, though. He knew that she didn’t love him. That she could never love him. 

“Something this special shouldn’t be used for this type of wedding.”

“I know. It’s either this or another gown from the closet. This one makes more sense, though.” Rey knew it did, and she nodded before taking the box back into the room with her. She felt the fragile, soft lace of the dress on her hand. It was the most beautiful gown she had ever seen. 

“I’m sorry about tomorrow.” Rey looked up and saw Padme.

“Wear it proudly, Rey. Maybe it will give you hope.”

“Are you sure you want me to wear your dress?”

“It suits you. Besides, its your gown now. Consider it my wedding present to you.”

“I’m terrified of tomorrow.”

“You’re not the only one.” Anakin had appeared in the room again. It seemed like he was always disappearing. Rey wondered if he had been like that when he was alive. Always going off, trying to find his own adventure. “He is too.”

“Kylo Ren, afraid? You must be mistaken.”

“I just saw him, I sensed it.”

“It’s your destiny, Rey. The Force has something planned for the two of you. It will work out, I promise.” Anakin smiled reassuringly. But Rey wasn’t convinced. 

“Ani, I think it’s time to go.” Anakin nodded, then looked at Rey again. 

“We’ll all be there for you tomorrow. Everything will work out. You’ll see.”

Kylo Ren knocked on Rey’s door sometime later, and she reluctantly accepted. She didn’t have the energy to say no like she did last night, even though she wasn’t hungry. 

Kylo noticed that Rey hardly ate anything, but he didn’t either. Perhaps he should have found another way to look after her. Most likely, she would never forgive him for this. He couldn’t understand why he would want her forgiveness. He knew that she was thinking about tomorrow night. He could sense her fear. He was afraid too, more than he was willing to admit.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning came all too soon. Both of them prepared silently for the wedding. Even though the lacings of the gown were simple, Padme helped Rey anyway. She knew that Rey wanted to forget as much as possible about the wedding in an hour. Rey waited for Kylo in the living room. They were to walk together to the room where the wedding was. Other than a wedding official, no one else would be there. So, he was denying her a real wedding too. What was new? 

Kylo walked out of his room, still in black, but the outfit was more formal than what he typically wore. He stared at Rey when he saw her. She was absolutely beautiful. His grandmother’s gown accentuated her lovely figure and the veil framed her face beautifully. He knew she was unhappy, though. She smiled a little, but he wasn’t sure if it was real. He held out his arm again and she took it, reluctantly. Would she ever want to touch him willingly? Probably not. 

The ceremony was relatively quick. The official had them recite everything in under an hour. Finally, the announcement was made that it was time to kiss the bride. Kylo and Rey’s eyes met, and he leaned in slowly and kissed her. He had meant it to be quick, but the kiss lingered on. To his surprise, Rey was kissing him back. Probably because she feels she has to Not because she actually wants to kiss me. With that sudden thought, Ren ended the kiss. The official left the room and only Kylo and Rey were left. The Force ghosts had stayed for the ceremony but had left before the kiss. 

“We could go outside again, if you want. The day’s not over yet.” Neither of them wanted to think about later. 

Rey nodded and the two of them went back to the suite to change into warmer clothes. Rey found a soft, grey gown in the closet with a black cape. It looked warm enough. She couldn’t borrow Kylo’s cloak again. Not that she wanted to. She tried not to think of him or the wedding they had just had. But she couldn’t help it. She was Lady Ren now, the commander’s wife. She couldn’t have foreseen that. She wondered what Master Luke would have said to that. Maybe he could have prevented it. The question was, would she have even wanted him too? She wasn’t sure. Kylo’s kiss still lingered on her lips, but she didn’t find herself repulsed by it. She found herself replaying the moment instead. She had expected the kiss to be harsh and quick, but it had been tender and longer than she expected. As if he didn’t want it to end. But she hadn’t wanted it to end either. Rey shook her head, she couldn’t let one kiss change everything that she felt for him. She still hated him, didn’t she?  
A few moments later, she left the safety of her room and went outside with Kylo. It was colder now, with winter approaching. She was glad she had gloves this time. She had found soft, fur gloves in the closet as well. Had the clothes been Padme’s? They must have been. 

“You must hate me.” Kylo looked at her, there was sadness and regret in his eyes. He didn’t seem like Kylo Ren at all in this moment. 

Everything in Rey wanted to say that she did hate him, that she would always hate him, but she knew that it wasn’t completely true. “I don’t hate you.” She admitted softly. Ren didn’t know what to say to that, so the two of them continued on in silence. 

“Out here, you can say whatever you want. It’s just us now.”

“I’m not sure I have anything else to say. My dreams have just been shattered in two, and my heart broken when I lost everyone I ever loved two days ago. There’s nothing left for me to say that you either haven’t already heard or don’t already know. I know you can sense some of my thoughts.”

“I’m not trying to,” He defended.

“I can sense parts of your thoughts, too. It’s not a secret.” She had made it sound so casual, but he knew that she was just covering up some of the hurt she felt. He had taken everything from her, and it had all been without a second thought. She was sure that he couldn’t care less. 

They spent the rest of the day outside, came in for lunch, then went back out again, avoiding Kylo’s (now their) suite all together. Neither of them wanted to think about the end of the day, but it came all too soon. As night fell, they went back to the rooms, specifically his room. They stood next to each other for a few minutes, before Kylo leaned in and kissed her again. She didn’t kiss him back. Without meaning to, she stepped back. 

“I’ve only known you for two days. Can’t this wait?” Rey hoped that he would say yes. She just wasn’t ready for this. And she didn’t want him. At least, most of her didn’t. She was ashamed to admit to herself that part of her did want him. 

He sighed. “You’re right. It can wait, but you can at least stay here. I promised you would be safe.”

“That includes being safe from you?” 

“Yes.”

Rey stayed in his room, but he didn’t kiss her again. About halfway through the night, the night terrors came. Just as they always did. He was restless for a while, then heard a voice calling out to him.

“Kylo?” It was Rey’s voice. He must have woken her up. With a start, his eyes opened. 

“I’m sorry. Did I wake you?”

“Hard not to with your shouting. Are you alright?” 

He thought for a moment. No one had ever asked him that before. Even if they had, he wouldn’t have given them an honest answer. Why did he feel compelled to give her one? 

“No, I’m not.”

“Would it be better if I left?”

“No!” he said, too quickly. “No”, he said again, more softly. “It would be better if you stayed. You’re here anyway.” Rey nodded and leaned into him. She had just meant to comfort him from the nightmare, nothing more. At least, that’s what she told herself. She didn’t want to think anything else. He stroked her hair gently and noticed that the fear he was feeling starting to go away. He started to ask Rey if this was okay, but she had already fallen asleep. He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep without any more dreams. 

When he woke up, Rey was still next to him, asleep. He hadn’t been dreaming. She was even more beautiful when she was asleep, if that was possible. How was she so calm when she knew how close he was? Was it possible that she felt something for him too? He laughed silently at himself. As if. Someone as beautiful as her and a monster such as him? It wasn’t possible. After he had dressed for the day, he looked in the mirror where the deep, red gash on his cheek was. That certainly hadn’t helped improve his appearance. He was surprised Rey had patched it up at all. But she had done a good job. Better than he expected. 

“You should get that looked at. I didn’t do a very good job.”

He turned around and saw Rey, already dressed for the day. 

“I deserve it. Another mark of the monster.”

“More like a battle scar.” He looked at her, curious. 

“You did save me. That scar didn’t come from doing something for the First Order.”

She was right, it hadn’t. For once, he had done something noble. Very unexpected of him. 

“It might require surgery.” He wasn’t so sure he wanted to go through with that. 

“Are you asking me to go with you?”

“Yes. If you’re willing to put up with my company.” Rey nodded and smiled slightly. His company wasn’t too terrible. Not as much as she had originally thought, anyways. 

He had been right, of course. The surgeons at Starkiller Base demanded to operate immediately, asking who had dared to try to fix it and done such a bad job. Kylo didn’t say anything. Only saying he couldn’t remember. Rey had tried at least. She had been there after the attack, they hadn’t. An hour later, the surgery was complete. He couldn’t see much out of his left eye at the moment but was assured that full vision would return within a few hours. At least it would give him a day off. Rey helped him back to their suite and the two of them sat together in the living room. 

“Nothing to do now but wait, I guess.” Rey sighed and leaned on Kylo’s shoulder. She hadn’t even noticed she had been doing it. She wasn’t afraid to be near him. Not anymore. He didn’t mind, though. Having her next to him was comforting. Anakin smiled as he held his wife. There was a chance for Kylo now. Rey just had to be the one. How could she not be?

A few hours later, Kylo’s vision returned and the first sight that he saw was Rey, curled up next to him on the couch. She was smiling. She had to be thinking of something else, anything but him. He knew he couldn’t make her smile like that. He carried her back to their room, just like he had carried her on her first night here. But she didn’t know that it had been him. He didn’t want her to know. As he laid her down gently on the bed, he was overwhelmed with the desire to kiss her. But he couldn’t. Not when she was so vulnerable. He had told her that he could take whatever he wanted, but that wasn’t true. She wasn’t someone he could take from her. He had already taken too much. 

He went back to the living room to give her some space. He needed to look over some reports anyway. Now that the wedding was over, there was more work than ever. First Order regulations required that he make a public announcement or at least send word to the political representatives of the First Order. Probably there would be some sort of event as well. He sighed loudly.  
“Great, just great.” Kylo muttered. 

“I remember my first political event with the Empire.” Anakin sat next to his grandson, who was still surprised that he was here.

“What happened?” Kylo asked, curious. Growing up, he had hardly heard anything about Darth Vader. Everything had always been about Anakin Skywalker. 

“I was completely lost without Padme. I was supposed to be this amazing commander and I didn’t even have a clue what I was doing. Politics are her thing, not mine. You’ve been to these events before though. Not like you don’t know what you’re doing.”

“Actually, I don’t. Look.” Kylo held out the note to his grandfather. 

“A gala? Not sure I can help with that. Never been to one.”

“I’ll never get my mask repaired in time. It’s in a month.”

“Do you really need it? I needed mine to breathe, but you seem fine without it.”

“I guess you’re ignoring how readable my emotions are right now. How much everyone can see.”

“Oh, that’s why. I think I understand, then. Here I thought you were just being dramatic.” Kylo glared at him and Anakin laughed. 

“I’m not dramatic.” Kylo muttered. 

“Sure you’re not. Especially when you break everything. You’re in complete control.” Anakin remarked sarcastically. He knew he was getting on Kylo’s nerves, but someone had to. Besides, Kylo admired him too much to do anything anyway. 

Anakin sighed. “Repair the mask if you truly feel you must, but I don’t think Rey will like that very much. Speaking of which, here she comes now.” Anakin disappeared to give them a moment alone.  
“Grandfather!” Kylo called out, frustrated. Of course he would leave. 

Rey entered the room, knowing Anakin had just talked to Kylo. And had clearly frustrated him. Kylo was still glaring at the seat next to him, as if Anakin would come back at any moment. 

“Family troubles?” Rey asked.

“You could say that.” Kylo smiled slightly. His grandfather wasn’t really that bad. He was different than he expected. He had expected his grandfather to actually look like Darth Vader, not Anakin Skywalker. He had been expecting him to teach him more about the Dark Side, but he hadn’t even mentioned it once. Did he not approve of his choice? 

“At least you have family. Even when I was with Han and Leia, I still didn’t exactly have a family. I’m not sure what happened to my real family.”

Kylo stood next to her. “You do now. I know I’m not much, but you have me. Always.” His voice was gentle and soft. Rey could hear the emotion and tenderness in his voice. He was truly being sincere.  
“Thank you.” She hugged him gently, but quickly. He was surprised but hugged her back. But the moment was over as soon as Rey pulled away. She still didn’t trust him completely, but it was a start. 


	8. Chapter 8

As the weeks passed, Rey and Kylo grew more comfortable with each other. Rey still didn’t want Kylo kissing her, but she let him hold her, sometimes. It seemed to relax him, especially at night when the terrors occurred. She was always there when he woke up, telling him everything would be alright. She wondered what he was afraid of every night. She had never asked, and she was sure he wouldn’t tell her. It seemed like he was in pain when he woke up. If only she knew what was going on. As if he would ever tell her. Neither of them completely trusted each other yet. He still thought she would try to run and he knew some part of her thought that he might try to kill her. If only he could make her see that she was safe with him. But how could she trust him, if he couldn’t trust her?

BB-9E had also started hanging around them more. He was almost always there, except at night. Something about the droid’s presence seemed to make Kylo nervous, but he never dismissed him. Rey wanted to, but she was still afraid of the droid. Just looking at him made her nervous. He was here now, and it seemed like he was watching her. She shifted uncomfortably and turned back to her book. It was a book on mechanical engineering that Kylo had brought her. She had told him that she used to repair engines and fix broken machinery when she was with the Resistance. He knew that it made her sad to talk about the Resistance. She missed her friends there, and he was the only friend she had here. As if he was even a good one. At least things were getting better between them. It was getting closer towards the gala and he still hadn’t told her. He probably should. She would need a dress. 

Kylo had started seeing the other Force ghosts as well. Obi-Wan, whom he was named after, and Padme, his grandmother, had appeared shortly after his last conversation with Anakin. They were probably more of Rey’s friends than his. He didn’t deserve friends, and they were probably sorely disappointed in him. He had never been ashamed of embracing the darkness before. But now, with Rey, he didn’t want to keep being cruel. It was hard acting like his usual self when he was outside of their rooms, but he couldn’t let anyone be suspicious. If they were, word would get back to Supreme Leader Snoke, who would most like hurt Rey or something worse. He couldn’t let that happen. She was exactly what he needed. He needed to find a way to show her how much he cared. The thought caught him off guard, but how could he not? If only he knew whether or not she cared for him. The book had been a start, but she deserved more. She deserved better than him, but there wasn’t anything he could do about that. They were stuck together. Marriage was permanent, especially in the First Order. 

After a long, tiring day of command on the bridge, he was eager to get back to Rey and be alone with her. That is, if BB-9E wasn’t there. He hoped the droid wasn’t spying on them. When he entered the room, he was surprised. Rey and BB-9E were talking, sort of. BB-9E was chirping and Rey was answering back. He was surprised, though. The droid normally wasn’t so cheerful. Obviously something had happened while he was gone. When he had left Rey this morning, she had been avoiding the droid as much as possible. 

“Kylo, there you are!” Rey greeted him cheerfully, then kissed him on the cheek. He was startled but didn’t object. 

“Not that I’m not glad to see you and my droid getting along, but what happened? You two hated each other this morning.”

“You didn’t tell me he knew so much about engine repair. He’s a brilliant mechanic. We have a lot more in common than I thought. Thanks again for the book. He and I started communicating when he noticed I was reading it.”

So that was it. Well, it was about time his droid started accepting Rey. Perhaps he’s not a spy. “You’re welcome.” He smiled, and Rey returned it. She seemed happier now. He could sense that she was content at that moment, even joyful that he was here. Why? What was changing between them? Whatever it was, he was glad for it. He gently held Rey as his droid chirped cheerfully around them.  
He had the day off the next day and for once, didn’t have to report at all to the bridge. He looked through the paperwork left in the living room. Still so much to do. And he kept neglecting to tell Rey about the gala. There wasn’t very much time left. He really should tell her. He couldn’t tell her right now, though. 

Rey was outside taking a walk. He had wanted to come, but he knew that he had to at least try to do his work. The officers couldn’t do everything. In the past, he would have been happy to give them all his work. But it wasn’t like he couldn’t do it himself. It was just reports, how hard would it be?

Rey walked in the snow outside the base. She wished Kylo were here, but she knew that work was important to him. He couldn’t spend every minute with her. Besides, there were others she could talk to. She communicated frequently with his droid now and she saw Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Padme quite often. She could tell that they sensed something different about her, but they only expressed joy on how things were with her and Kylo. She knew that she felt happy around him, more than she had ever expected to feel. She could sense that he enjoyed her company too. Not knowing what else to do, Rey put together a snowball and through it near a tree. 

One minute, Kylo was dry in the living room and the next moment he was covered in a little bit of snow. He stood up and saw Rey. She gasped in surprise.

“Kylo?”

“Rey?”

“What’s going on?”

“I don’t know. It must be the Force.”

“Can you see my surroundings?”

“What?” Rey was surprised, of all things to ask, why that?

“I can’t see yours. Just you.” He smiled, his grin being slightly flirtatious. Of course, he was just asking to get her attention. How typical. But Rey smiled anyway. 

“You’re lucky you didn’t get any snow on my paperwork.”

“Is your paperwork all you care about right now?” Rey teased. 

“There is something more important.” He grinned and went up to her, wanting to be close to her. Rey smiled at him. To the surprise of both of them, he was able to reach out and hold her hand. The connection was deeper than they thought. He turned around when he heard a series of chirps. BB-9E was looking at him curiously. Kylo let go of Rey’s hand and disappeared. He sat down again and tried to focus on the paperwork, but he couldn’t help but think of Rey and the connection the two of them had just had. He had never felt anything like it before. Warmth and light all in one touch.  
Somehow, he managed to get almost everything done. Rey had come back a few hours ago and sat across from him reading her mechanics book. She looked at BB-9E then pointed to something. He chirped a response, but Kylo didn’t catch what it was. He saw Rey smile at the droid, then back at him. 

After dinner, Kylo and Rey retired to their room. Finally, they were alone. No droids and no force ghosts. Kylo smiled at Rey, and she blushed and looked away. He leaned in to kiss her, but she turned, and he only kissed her cheek. 

“Still not ready?” He asked, disappointed. But he couldn’t rush her. 

“I’m sorry.”

“You never have to be sorry, Rey. I understand. We still haven’t known each other for very long. Take your time.” Rey appreciated that he wasn’t rushing her. Most men would. It was the first time she had acknowledged him as a man, but he wasn’t a monster. He was just as human as her, and something inside him was causing him very real pain. The two laid down after turning off the lights. Kylo held Rey, hoping that maybe tonight the night terrors wouldn’t come. How wrong he would be. 

“Kylo Ren,” A voice called out. Snoke. It had to be. Rey stood in a room with Kylo. But he couldn’t see her. She hoped that Snoke couldn’t see her either. She wondered where she was. Then she realized. She was experiencing Kylo’s terror with him. 

“You have failed me again. You will never get past the rank of captain if you constantly fail me.” Rey realized that his night terror was an old memory, since he was a commander now.  
“My apologies, master. It won’t happen again.”

“You are weak, Ren. Embrace the Dark Side fully. Something is holding you back.”

“Supreme Leader, I assure you…” But Snoke wasn’t listening. He sent a bolt of Sith lightening towards Kylo. It shot him backwards and he was leaning against a wall. Rey rushed towards him. He wasn’t waking up. His eyes were still closed. 

“Kylo!” Rey stroked his cheek and listened for a heartbeat. She couldn’t hear anything. 

“Kylo!” Rey called out again and woke up. Someone was holding her. She was startled at first, not knowing who it was. Then remembered it was Kylo.

“It’s alright, Rey. I won’t let anything happen to you. You’re safe.” He used his hand to stroke her cheek and noticed it was wet with tears. Rey leaned in and let him hold her. She was still shaking in fear from the night terror. She had never experienced one like it before. How did he deal with it every night? He was braver than she thought. 

“I thought I’d lost you. In that moment, I’d never felt so alone. I thought you were dead. I forgot that it was just a dream.”

“You’re not alone,” Kylo’s deep voice resonated within Rey as he gazed into her eyes. She felt safe in his arms, and she never wanted him to let go. She wanted to stay in this moment forever, with him holding her in his arms. 

“Neither are you,” Rey answered back, her voice shaking. There were tears in her eyes as she looked into his eyes. It was as if everything she felt for him was threatening to come out and expose itself at any moment. She realized that she was falling in love with him. Of all the people she thought she could love, he had never been one of them, until now.

The two continued to look at each other, then Rey slowly leaned in and kissed him slowly. In that moment, she needed to know exactly how real he was. She needed to know that what she was feeling was real. She closed her eyes and felt him lean in to her kiss. He reached out a hand to cup her cheek and deepen the kiss further. She didn’t resist. She wanted him, she wanted all of him. And he wanted all of her. It was real. The two of them. There could be no mistake now. There had been no night more wonderful in her entire life. Now, they were completely together, joined as one. Nothing would be able to tear them apart now. 

Kylo woke up before Rey the next morning. He watched as she slept peacefully. Happiness radiating from her. He hadn’t thought that anything like last night could have ever occurred between them. Especially since earlier in the day she had said no. He was glad that she had changed her mind. He wondered what it was that made her change her mind. He wished she hadn’t seen his night terrors, though. It was right that she know everything about him, but he wanted to protect her. He hoped that he would always be able to keep her away from Snoke, but that couldn’t last forever.  
As he was almost finished getting ready for the day, Rey woke up. When she looked at him, she blushed when she saw that he wasn’t wearing a shirt. 

“Do you have something, a cowl, or something you can put on?”

“After last night, you’re still embarrassed? Or is it just not a good view?” He grinned as Rey blushed again. 

“I didn’t say that. I’m just not used to all this. Being married, I mean. Truly married.”

“I’m new to this to, Rey. But we’re in this together.” He leaned in and kissed her, intending it to be quick, but he couldn’t help but stay. The paperwork could wait. Rey was more important right now. Just as he started to deepen the kiss, he heard the main door to the suite open, as well as a series of welcoming, yet overly cheerful chirps. 

“Great timing, droid.” He muttered and went to put on a shirt. Rey laughed softly at his irritation with the droid, and his clear embarrassment at being nearly caught in the act. 

“Remind me to make it up to you later.” He smiled at Rey.

“Don’t worry, I will.” She smiled back. She wouldn’t forget. 

Kylo and Rey entered the living room where BB-9E was waiting for them to start their day. The three of them went to the dining room. As they walked down the hallway, Kylo tried to suppress his feelings and not give anything away. But he couldn’t help it. He reached out and held Rey’s hand. She was surprised that he was holding her hand with everyone else around, but she didn’t mind too much. It wasn’t like the officers would question him. She was his wife, after all. 

After breakfast, Kylo decided he couldn’t hold it off anymore. 

“Rey, there’s something I forgot to tell you. I meant to tell you a few days ago, or last week. I just kept forgetting.”

Rey looked at him curiously, and he continued. “There’s a gala we have to go to in two weeks. It’s a First Order celebration for our wedding.” The smile was gone from her face now. 

“Of course. I almost forgot about that. Everything’s been so different lately. You’ve been different.” The two of them were alone in their suite, so no one could hear them. Only Kylo’s droid could, but he wasn’t paying attention. He just made chirping noises, as if talking to himself. Maybe he was. It was hard to tell what a droid was thinking. 

“So have you. Rey, I…” His voice had grown soft. He wanted to tell her he loved her. But he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. Even after last night, he still wasn’t sure if she could love him back. He knew that she could love Ben Solo, if he showed more of that side of himself, but could she ever love Kylo Ren? 

“Yes?” Rey looked at him, her gentle eyes seeming to look right through his soul.

“I’ll tell you another time. For now, there’s the gala to focus on.” Rey was disappointed he hadn’t said anything else but didn’t comment on it. The gala was the most important thing right now. Everything else would just have to wait. He just hoped that he could hold it in. 


	9. Chapter 9

“Have you ever been to a gala before?” Rey asked Kylo curiously.

“A few times. When I first joined the Order. It’s not very exciting. And it’s extremely formal.”

“Even the women weren’t interesting?” Rey wasn’t sure she really wanted to know if he’d ever been involved with anyone else, but it was better it come up now then at the gala.

Kylo sensed her jealousy and smirked slightly. “Rey, have you ever met any First Order women?”

“Of course not, I’ve been with the Resistance.”

“You’re lucky then. They’re extremely aggressive and very jealous.”

“Jealous?”

“If they even catch you looking at someone who could be their competition, you might not see them again. I think, if you’re looking for a way to describe them, I would use the word dangerous. You’re safe though, I’ve never had a girlfriend. Wasn’t interested.” 

Rey was relieved but tried not to show it. She was surprised though. She had expected him to have several girlfriends. She knew that power was attractive to some women. She underestimated her own power now, though. As Lady Ren, she had more power than any woman in the entire galaxy. Did that put her in danger? 

“Rey,” Kylo looked at her, with tenderness in his eyes. “You’re the only woman in the world for me.” He leaned in to kiss her and Rey returned the kiss. She wasn’t used to such passionate kisses. Before Kylo, there hadn’t been any romance in her life and she had never been kissed by anyone. She had no memories of her parents, but even if she did, she had no way of knowing if they had ever loved her. They had left Jakku when she was two. 

Rey returned her attention to Kylo, who was now holding her in his arms. She had never dared to dream that anyone could care for her this much. Han and Leia had cared about her, but it hadn’t even come close to how deep her connection with Kylo was. As they were kissing, BB-9E started chirping teasingly. Unfortunately, it ended the moment and Kylo broke the kiss. Kylo glared at his droid angrily, and Rey laughed. Her new family hadn’t been anything like she expected, but in many ways, it was better than she had ever thought possible. With Kylo, she felt that she was home. 

Kylo was almost distracted from the gala again, but he forced himself to refocus. If he started kissing Rey again, they would never discuss it and it would lead to something else. Something much better.  
“Regarding the gala, you might need some training.” He wasn’t sure why he felt nervous asking about normal details, but it reminded him of how little he actually knew of Rey’s life before him. He almost didn’t want to imagine her previous life, at least not her life on Jakku. 

“You’ll need a dress. I don’t know anything about that though, so you’ll have to talk to Padme.”

“Is there an issue with that? She seems like she should know about how to dress for a gala.”

“It’s not that she wouldn’t.” Kylo looked around nervously, searching for any sign that his grandmother might be listening. “It’s just, her information might be slightly outdated. That and she’s never been to a First Order gala. All I know is that you’ll need a gown. Other than that, I didn’t really notice anything particular.”

“I’ve never worn a gown. I’ve never been to a formal event before. The Resistance had parties sometimes, but compared to a First Order gala, it was extremely small scale and not formal at all. I didn’t really participate in those much, anyway. I wanted to stay and work on the engines.”

“Somehow that doesn’t surprise me.” Kylo would have had to be blind to not notice how much she loved working on engines and machinery. She had been so absorbed in the book he had gotten her that it was difficult for her to put it down at times. He wondered if she liked to read anything else. He would have to ask. He would give her anything. Surely she had to know that by now. He thought for a moment. There was an empty room in their suite. Maybe he could do something with that. 

“Anything else I need to know about the gala?” Rey’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts. He could think about the empty room later. 

“Do you know how to dance?” 

Rey looked at him, surprised. “On what occasion do you think I would have danced?”

“I don’t know.” He shrugged, not having really thought about it. “A Resistance event?” He didn’t know much about the Resistance. He had only seen the parties that Leia used to host for political events. He had always avoided having anything to do with the Resistance. Until now. He knew Rey was still seriously devoted to the Resistance. He knew how much she wanted to be a hero. Didn’t she know how much she was saving him? He wished that he could be enough for her. He didn’t want to share her devotion, possibly her love, with the Resistance. 

“I told you, they were informal parties. I don’t know what type of dancing you’re talking about, but I am pretty sure the Resistance didn’t have anything like it.”

“Actually, they did. But it wasn’t for the Resistance. It happened at political dinners. There was always dinner and dancing.”

“How would you know about that? Was it when you were Ben Solo?” Kylo tensed at the name, and Rey instantly regretted saying it. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that.”

“You have a right to. My wife should at least know everything about me. It’s not like anyone else will ever know. I don’t talk with anyone the way I do with you.” Rey looked at him and she saw how trusting he was. It was all in his eyes. It was clear that he trusted her greatly. And she trusted him, with almost everything in her. Part of her still worried that he would break her heart. Or that she would break his.

“Yes, when I had that name. My mother used to host political dinners constantly. I almost never saw her, and I saw my father even less. Neither of them were ever really around. They had their lives and forgot about me. It’s no wonder I turned to the First Order. They were the only ones who had ever accepted me. Uncle Luke abandoned me when he sensed the Dark Side within me.” Rey’s eyes filled with sorrow. She hadn’t realized that his life had been difficult, too. 

“Did he tell you what happened? The night I destroyed his temple, did he tell you why? I know that you trained with him.”

“I didn’t train with him very long. Only a few months. He didn’t want to train me. He said I was reckless and impulsive instead of patient. I didn’t think through my feelings enough.”

“Sounds like the same thing he said about me. No wonder we get along so well.”

Rey smiled briefly. They hadn’t gotten along so well when they first met. How had everything changed so much in so short a time? It seemed like only yesterday she was with the Resistance and now she was married to the commander of the First Order. But she didn’t regret it. Not anymore. 

“Yes. Luke did mention that. He said that you attacked him.”

“Do you believe him?”

“I don’t know what or who to believe anymore. Now that I know you, there’s a lot that doesn’t make sense. It’s all so confusing now.”

Kylo sat in silence for a moment. It made sense that she would be conflicted, but at the same time, it was disappointing. If only things weren’t so complicated. If only there was more than just the light and the dark. It was a while before he spoke again, knowing Rey was waiting for an answer. 

“Luke attacked me. He was afraid of me, thinking I would be like his father. I guess he wasn’t completely wrong. But I acted in self-defense. He tried to kill me, and I fought back. I joined the First Order because I felt like I didn’t have anywhere else to go. No one understood me. But you might. I’ve never told anyone this story.”

“You didn’t have to. It must hurt.”

“It does. But the past is gone. That’s the thing about the past. You can’t let it hold you back. You have to let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That's the only way to become what you are meant to be. It was the only thing I could do. If something is holding you back, you have to let go of it.”

Rey knew what he meant. But she wasn’t sure if she could take another risk with letting someone else into her heart. She had already lost her parents, Luke, and her friends at the Resistance. She didn’t want to lose anyone else, especially not Kylo. If she let someone else in and lost them, it would break her. She couldn’t bear any more pain. Not for love. And in that moment, she knew that she truly, deeply loved Kylo even if she couldn’t tell him. At that same moment, Kylo had the same realization. His love for Rey was true and deep, but he knew that he had to tell her. Whatever the risks. 


	10. Chapter 10

The two of them didn’t finish talking about the gala. Talking about Luke had taken precedence, even though Kylo would have rather discussed anything else, even the weather. He looked at Rey for a moment, then stood and retreated to their room and sat on the bed with his head in his hands. He hadn’t thought about what his parents or Luke had done to him in such a long time. He was stronger if he forgot about it. Most of the time. He heard Rey come in and looked at her with weak eyes. Rey didn’t say anything, but simply held him and laid her head on his chest. He felt safe with her. It was just the two of them and right now, no one else mattered in the world but them. He wanted it to stay like that forever, but that it was impossible. There would always be the First Order and the Resistance, just like there would always be two sides to the force.

Kylo woke up with Rey in his arms. The two of them must have fallen asleep last night. The feeling of holding Rey in his arms was the best feeling in the world. He wished that he could just tell her that he loved her. That she meant everything to him and he would give everything up for her, even the First Order. He knew that if he were Ben Solo again he could. How could he command an entire army but not be able to confess his love? But he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. Maybe after the gala. After that, there would surely be enough time to tell her. They would have all the time in the world after that. Having decided that, he kissed Rey gently then went to finish getting ready for the day. He could sense he was needed on the bridge. Better to go before he was called. 

If only he could just be alone with Rey. One day, no interruptions, including that of his playful, but well-meaning droid. He had received BB-9E when he became the commander of the First Order and the droid had never shown any signs of being cheerful or affectionate, or able to feel anything, really. Maybe it was Rey. There was just something about her that made him want to let the light in. But he had lied. He hadn’t let go of the past, he was still holding on to what could have been, if Han and Leia had been there for him more. Or if Luke had actually cared about him. Would anything be different? 

Rey woke up expecting to see Kylo next to her, but noticed he was gone. He was always being called away just when she thought about letting him in more. What a coincidence. It seemed like something, or someone, was always trying to keep them apart. She didn’t want to think about that now. There was already so much to worry about. 

“It would seem things are better with you and Ben.” Padme could never bring herself to call him Kylo Ren. She knew that the light was in there somewhere. She was sure Rey knew it too. If only Ben could learn to find the light and embrace it. 

“Better, yes. But there’s still something holding him back.”

“And you as well.” Padme smiled knowingly as Rey attempted to deny it. But that was pointless. It would have been hard to miss the love that the two of them had for each other. Whether or not either of them would admit it. 

“Sometimes the hardest part of loving someone is understanding that you can’t change everything. There are some things both of you will have to work out on your own.”

“I need your help with something. If you wouldn’t mind.”

“The gala. I heard about that, too. I feel slightly insulted with him having called my knowledge outdated. Old-fashioned can still be fashionable. But of course, men wouldn’t understand that. Particularly Ben and Anakin, since both of them only wear black.”

“You heard that?” Rey smiled. Wait until Kylo figured out that his grandmother knew what he said. But then again, he might find out from Padme herself. That would certainly be interesting to be around for. 

“It’s interesting how he thinks that if he can’t see us, then we’re not there. We’ve always watched over him. After he turned to the Dark Side. Hoping that maybe we could turn him back to the light.”

“What about Luke? Will Kylo ever see him?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Padme shook her head softly. “I know that Luke wants nothing more to do with him. If only the two of them could put the past behind them.”

“Kylo said the same thing about the past, about needing to let it go.” 

“Well, that’s interesting. I happen to know that he’s still haunted by his own past. Anyway, about your dress. I promise, it will the best night of your life. My grandson won’t know what hit him. He’ll be so surprised. I’m sure he hasn’t been surprised at anything in a long time.” 

Rey wanted to ask more about Kylo but refrained. Padme might not know much about how he felt anyway. Kylo was good at keeping his emotions hidden. She never knew what he was thinking. It was only when they were alone that she could understand him. Otherwise, he was a closed book. But she knew he was keeping something from her. And she was too. 

Rey and Padme worked out the details of the dress and sewed it together. It would be unlike anything that she had ever known before. The look on Kylo’s face would be worth it though. Rey asked Kylo to order her some fabrics but didn’t say anything else about the dress. He knew something was up. She was extremely secretive of what she and Padme were working on, insisting it was a surprise and he would know at the gala. He tried to content himself with that, but he found it difficult to wait regarding anything concerning Rey. Not that he had ever been patient. Probably why he had never become a Jedi. 

The weeks passed, and the day of the gala came quickly. Kylo had needed to be fitted for a new suit, and the mask had never been replaced. He had thought about it but changed his mind. It was better to see Rey through his own eyes rather than through a mask. With or without it, the officers were still as fearful of him as ever. No matter what, he was still the fearful Commander Ren. He wondered how long he could keep up the appearance. It was getting harder every day and he hoped that he wouldn’t slip up anytime soon. If he did, it would be disastrous for both him and Rey. After the fitting, he returned to his room to get ready. Rey was in her old room with Padme. He wouldn’t see her until tonight. Without Rey, the day seemed much longer, almost endless. No laughter to distract him or warm smiles to comfort him. Without her, he was alone. Just as he had been before she came. 

When evening finally came, he went to the living room to meet Rey, who was waiting for him. When he saw her, he stopped and stared. She looked more beautiful than ever. He had been a fool to ever think that she was anything less than beautiful. Her hair was pulled back and curled. He noticed that she had tied with a white ribbon. As white as the gown she was wearing. It was elegant and a perfect fit. The fabric of her dress shimmered, and he was stunned. He was well-dressed, to be sure, but Rey was exquisite. There wouldn’t be anyone at the gala dressed more beautifully than her. He had almost forgotten that she was supposed to wear her wedding dress. But he thought this new gown suited her more than the other one had. This gown was unique to Rey. And there was no one like her in the entire galaxy.

“You look beautiful, Rey.”

“Thank you. You look very handsome.” Rey blushed, having never given him a compliment before. He was surprised that she still blushed even after all the time they had spent together, but he didn’t mind. He held out his arm and she willingly accepted it. Together, the two of them walked towards the room where the gala was being held, BB-9E trailing behind them. When they arrived at the gala, all eyes were on them. BB-9E was no longer chirping happily and Kylo was as stiff as he always was at these events. He knew Rey was nervous since she held wasn’t smiling and held tighter to his arm. Not that he wanted her to let go. He needed Rey the most right now. Neither of them could afford to make any mistakes tonight. 

He had never been favorable to be around, even amongst the First Order. The officers greeted him first, offering their congratulations on his marriage, as was traditional and expected. He knew that most of them probably couldn’t care less. He noticed how their eyes lingered on Rey. She was the most beautiful woman in the room and everyone noticed. He wondered if she was aware of the effect she was having. Probably not. Rey didn’t try to draw attention to herself and she didn’t seem very comfortable under their gaze. He cleared his throat and the officers looked away, being embarrassed for being reprimanded. Others offered their congratulations, whether or not they sincerely meant it, then dinner was announced. Rey struggled to hide her emotions. She was overwhelmed. She had never seen so much food anywhere. She had eaten decently at the Resistance, better than on Jakku, but this was unlike anything she had seen before. She could tell Kylo was uncomfortable during dinner though. This must have been the first time he had gone to an event for the Order without a mask. Under the table, she held his hand, and when he was sure no one was looking, he offered her a small smile. She smiled back. They would get through this night together. 

After dinner, it was expected that the commander and his wife would have the first dance. Kylo had forgotten to teach Rey how to dance. How could he have forgotten? Mentally, he berated himself for it. He and Rey stepped into the waltz position. Rey placed her hand in his and he placed his hand on her waist. To his surprise, she was smiling. He read her thoughts. His grandmother, of course. Apparently, his grandfather had helped as well. He couldn’t have been more grateful to them. He definitely owed them, not just for this, but for so much more. 

The music started. A slow, elegant tune playing. Wedding music that would have been played if they had had a traditional wedding. At least with the gala he could make it up to Rey. He held Rey in his arms as they waltzed across the room. She must have had a natural talent for it. It had taken him years to get where she had gotten to in a few weeks. She truly was amazing, in every way. Remembering the steps, he twirled her and then she was back in his arms. When the music ended, he kissed her, and it was as if there was no one else in the room. Both of them had forgotten that they weren’t alone. Suddenly he was embarrassed, but no one seemed to notice. This was a celebration for their wedding after all. They were expected to kiss. He hoped no one noticed how much in love they really were. As far as anyone else was concerned, this was a political alliance and nothing more. No one knew that Rey was with the Resistance. And if it was up to him, no one would ever know. 

At the end of the gala, one of the superior officers approached Kylo. 

“Commander Ren, Lady Ren.” The officer acknowledged, bowing to them both. Rey curtsied and Kylo nodded. 

“General Hux.” Ren acknowledged, stiffly. Out of all his officers, Hux was his least favorite. Especially since the Supreme Leader liked him better. Ren knew that Hux wanted his position but would never say so. At least his annoying cat wasn’t present. Millicent was never pleasant company and would only listen to Hux. 

“A splendid party, wouldn’t you say?” To anyone, it would have seemed like a casual conversation, but Kylo knew better. Hux was looking for information about his relationship with Rey. As if he would ever talk to Hux about Rey.

“It was acceptable. Surely the First Order could have spent our time a better way, though. This was a political marriage after all. Hardly worth noticing.”

“How curious. It almost seemed as if there was more to you and Lady Ren than the two of you let on.” Clearly, Hux had noticed the passion in their kiss. He shouldn’t have let his emotions take control. Rey tried not to blush. She had been emotional as well. 

“Well, we are married. Of course I would take full advantage of the situation.” Ren grinned, needing to say no more. His meaning was clear. Hux turned crimson and nodded. 

“Of course, sir, that is expected. I will take my leave now, if that is acceptable.” Hux was eager to be away from Ren, but at least now he would have something interesting to report to the Supreme Leader. He had been watching Ren closely since the day of the wedding and took notice of the changes in the Commander. He hadn’t broken anything in weeks, and he was not nearly as short with everyone as he normally was. Try as he might deny it, there was more to his relationship with Lady Ren than would appear. And he was determined to find out what it was. No matter what it took. 

“Of course, General.” Kylo nodded and held out his arm to Rey. 

“Shall we go?” Rey nodded, more than ready to leave and return to their rooms. The gala had been interesting, but neither of them felt that they fit in at First Order socials (or whatever they were called). 

She smiled at Ren, forgetting they were still at the gala. Kylo forgot too and smiled back. Neither of them noticed Hux watching them curiously. But now he knew. Commander Ren never smiled, and no one could smile like Lady Ren had unless she was in love. He wondered what the Supreme Leader would think of this news. It would be very interesting indeed. He knew that Ren had been warned against having compassion. What would Snoke think if his apprentice was breaking the rules? Surely no one would tell. Hux grinned deviously. Maybe now he could finally get that promotion that he deserved. Commander Hux, he liked the sound of that. And it would be even better with Ren finally gone forever. 


	11. Chapter 11

“Finally, it’s over. I don’t ever want to do that again.” Kylo sighed in relief, as he carried Rey into their suite, BB-9E whirling in behind them, chirping in agreement. Rey sighed happily, her arms around Kylo’s neck and his twirled her around the room.

“I agree, but I wouldn’t mind the dance again. Or to see that look on General Hux’s face again.” Rey smiled and laughed but blushed again. She had known exactly what he meant. He was always so straight-forward and serious. She was sure that she wouldn’t have been able to say anything like that with a straight face. Kylo smiled at her. She had a beautiful laugh. It was musical, in a way. He had never thought of laughter that way before. All the same he laughed with her, still getting used to how it felt. He hadn’t laughed much before he met her. 

“I’ve never seen him looked so embarrassed. He should have known what he was asking.” The two of them laughed together as Kylo carried Rey into their room. BB-9E had already left, sensing the two of them wanted to be alone. Kylo laid Rey down on the bed as she smiled up at him. He kissed her as passionately as he had after the dance. She leaned in as he deepened the kiss. Suddenly, he stopped, now gazing intently at her. 

“Rey, do you think that you could ever be happy, here with me?” He asked softly. 

“More than I could ever say. No one in the whole galaxy could make me happier than you do right now.” That was all he needed. He continued kissing her, the night was better than there wedding night could have ever been. For the first time, there were no night terrors, and everything was perfect. If only it would last. But now that Hux was looking for something, it was only a matter of time.  
He and Rey spent the next day completely together. He wasn’t called to the bridge, and for once, he and Rey were uninterrupted. Even BB-9E wasn’t following them. Kylo showed Rey around the base, having neglected to give her the full tour when they first arrived. Suddenly, they entered a room he didn’t recognize. There were tall shelves in the room and books everywhere. The First Order Archives. How could he have forgotten this room? He had come here a lot when he first joined the Knights of Ren. Back then, he would have done anything to impress the Supreme Leader and show his commitment to the Dark Side. Now he was committed to Rey. 

Rey was amazed at the size of the room and the number of books and materials within. The Resistance didn’t have an archive anywhere near as grand as this. She remembered learning a little about the Jedi Archives in Coruscant. If only she could have seen it. 

“I didn’t know anyone had this many books in the whole Galaxy.” 

“They don’t all belong to the First Order.”

He led her to a smaller room within the archive room. 

“Close your eyes. I have something to show you.” Rey arched an eyebrow but closed her eyes. Kylo held her hand then led her into the room. He slowly let go of her hands then went to open the curtains. It had been a long time since there had been light in this room. He had long preferred the darkness. He still couldn’t understand why Rey enjoyed sunlight so much after living on Jakku for so long. 

“Can I open my eyes yet?”

He turned back towards Rey. “Alright, now!”

Rey opened her eyes and gasped. 

“This is my personal collection. And I’m giving it to you. Thank you for everything Rey.” He smiled at her, then noticed that her own smile had faltered slightly. 

“Thank you, but I can’t read this many books.” He laughed, thinking she was making a joke. 

“Of course not. Even I haven’t read everything. That would take forever.”

“No, I mean I can’t read well enough to understand these books. I understand the basics of reading, but most of these are probably more advanced than I can understand.” 

“I can help you. You need a teacher.”

“Yes, I do.” Rey nodded in agreement. 

She leaned her head against his chest, listening to his heart beat. It was fast, as if he was nervous. But she was nervous too. She didn’t understand the power of the connection they had. She just knew that it ran deep for both of them.

“Thank you. It’s more than I’ve ever received from anyone. It’s wonderful, Kylo.” No one had ever given her such a grand gift. Rey smiled, looking into his eyes. She knew now that he was changing. She didn’t know how or why, but she was grateful for it all the same. If there was still light left in him, there was hope. Hope for her, for the Resistance, for everyone. She saw Kylo looking back at her and their eyes met. They held each other’s gaze for a while, feeling the happiness between them and the strength of their feelings. There was no hate, no bitterness, no resentment, just love. It had to be. Kylo kissed Rey softly and both of them closed their eyes. The snow fell softly outside, but neither of them noticed anything but each other. 

Rey and Kylo stayed in his archival rooms, enjoying the books and each other’s company. It was nice to have a day off. He knew it wouldn’t last forever, though. The fact that Snoke had yet to summon him recently was alarming in itself. Previously, Snoke had expressed an interest in Rey and Kylo was sure that it hadn’t gone away. If he had it his way, Rey would never meet Snoke, but it was beyond his control. Snoke was his master, he was the apprentice, as his grandfather had been to Darth Sidious. It was just the way things were. 

“You need to do something.” Kylo looked up at his grandfather. He was sitting in the living room looking through First Order reports of the Resistance. He had been told it was high priority and had been forced to leave Rey. She seemed content enough in the archive room, but he knew she was disappointed when she sadly kissed him goodbye. He was still getting used to how frequently they kissed. He enjoyed it, but when he had first met Rey, he had not even dared to hope that she could care so much for him. Or that he could for her. He noticed Anakin looking at him curiously. He must know that he was thinking about Rey. 

“Your mind is somewhere else, Ben.” Kylo looked up again, but he wasn’t angry.

“I know. You’re not Ben anymore. But I’m not sure you believe that anymore.” Anakin smiled a knowing smile. It was like when he had tried to deny that he was still Anakin Skywalker. Even with all the power he had gained as Darth Vader, it was never as strong as the call to the light. To his old self. Thankfully, Luke had helped him redeem himself and he was Anakin Skywalker once again.

“I don’t know what to believe anymore. I don’t know who I am anymore. I can’t be Kylo Ren, but I can’t be Ben either. I still have too much dark and not enough light. I thought this was supposed to all make sense. Now that I have Rey, nothing makes sense.” He looked away from the files. He couldn’t look at them anymore. They were just another symbol of what was wrong with his life. Besides, he no longer wanted to crush the Resistance anyway. He knew how much everyone meant to Rey and he thought back to when he had last seen his father. If only he could have meant as much to him as Rey did.  
“Women have a way of doing that. Padme was that way. She tried to save me from the darkness, as Rey is trying to do for you. Unlike me, you’re at least willing to listen. I wish I had listened when I had the chance. It’s mostly because of me that you’re in this mess. If I hadn’t turned, everything would be different. Maybe we could all be the family that we were meant to be.”

“Grandfather, it’s not your fault. I could have still chosen this with or without Darth Vader. No one knows for sure.”

“You didn’t choose, Ben. You never fully chose the Dark Side. And now, I don’t think you will.” Anakin turned and saw Rey entering the room. He smiled, then disappeared. He never really had gotten to talk to Ben about what he meant to say. Another time. But time was something they were all running short on. 

“Are you alright?” Rey sat next to Kylo, putting her hand on his shoulder. She could sense that he was troubled. As soon as he looked at her, she knew she was right. 

“No, I’m not.” He shook his head, his eyes wet. “I’m not, Rey.” The two just held each other in that moment. Rey knew that he needed her more than words could ever say. And she needed him just as much. He seemed slightly better, still holding on to Rey several hours later. But she didn’t mind. There was no better feeling in the world than being in his arms. There was safety and security there, something she never could have expected from him at all. As he held her, his black curls fell softly on her face. When she had first met him, she could have never imagined that he could be this handsome or this caring. He was more than any of her dreams could have ever hoped for. He looked at her and she met his eyes, maybe now was the time to tell him. She would have to tell him eventually. She didn’t know that he was struggling with the same thing. 

“Kylo, I…” She started. 

“Ben.” 

“What?” Rey asked, surprised. 

“I can’t be Kylo. Not around you. You bring out the light in me, Rey. I didn’t think that it was there anymore, but it is. There’s not as much of the Dark Side in me as there used to be. I can barely act the same anymore. I can’t be Kylo Ren, anymore. I’m not sure I’m good enough to be Ben again, but for you, Rey, I’ll try. I just want to be the man that you deserve. You deserve so much more than I can give you.” His whole life he had struggled with not being good enough. He always wanted to be more than he was. But he just couldn’t seem to find his way. 

“You’re enough for me.” Rey stroked his cheek gently. “Ben.” He kissed her softly, gently, then carried her to their room, letting their emotions take over. Knowing that she could see the light in him, a new strength came to him. They could fight this. They could fight the darkness together. They were a team now. 


	12. Chapter 12

“We’ll need a plan.” Kylo, now Ben once again, sat in the dining room with Rey as they had their usual breakfast together.

“What kind of plan?” Rey asked curiously. 

“An escape plan. It won’t be long before I do something that will give myself away. Hux almost noticed something was up. It won’t be long before he starts trying to spy on us. He’s more loyal to Snoke than he is to me.”

“Are we in danger?”

“I might be, but I won’t let anything happen to you, Rey. I wouldn’t have the strength to do this without you.” Ben smiled as he looked at Rey. She was everything to him and always would be.  
“What about…” Rey started to ask about Snoke, but then the door to the dining hall opened. Rey and Ben stiffened when General Hux entered. Just the sight of Hux made Rey feel unsettled. Hux definitely could not be trusted. She hadn’t heard much about his cat, Millicent, but was sure that wouldn’t go well either. Ben didn’t talk much about her. He had said that he didn’t like cats, but it was much more than that. 

“Commander Ren, Lady Ren,” Hux acknowledging, bowing slightly. Rey could sense his hatred for Kylo but said nothing. She just wanted him to state his business and be gone. Rey controlled her emotions, and she and Ben both nodded at General Hux. 

“Commander Ren, your presence is needed on the bridge.” Hux stated formally, but he saw the exchange between the commander and his wife. There was something more to the two of them then they let on. He just had to find out. Perhaps it was time to make the Supreme Leader aware of the situation. Ben looked at Rey for a moment, then nodded and left. He sensed Hux’s suspicion. If he kissed his wife goodbye, it would be obvious. 

Rey was disappointed but understood why he hadn’t kissed her. Hux was starting to become a threat to the two of them. They couldn’t give him the slightest chance to be right about their connection, or their plan. The dining room door opened again, and Rey jumped back, startled. When the door opened, BB-9E rolled in. Rey sighed in relief. She knew that she could trust the droid. It would have been hard for the droid to not notice their passionate exchanges, and she had assumed, since neither her nor Ben had been summoned to see Snoke, that BB-9E was not monitoring them. Rey looked at the droid and he chirped inquisitively. Suddenly, Rey had an idea. 

“As the commander’s wife, I think that I should know what is going on. Don’t you agree?” The droid whirred uncertainly and looked at Rey worriedly. He chirped again. 

“They’ll never know. We’ll just watch from a hiding place. Come on!” Rey left the dining hall and BB-9E trailed behind her. He wasn’t sure she was making the right decision, but with Master Ren gone, someone had to watch over her. The two of them had a knack for getting into trouble. 

Rey looked cautiously down the hallway. Two stormtroopers passed, but they didn’t see her or BB-9E. Even if they had, Kylo had made sure that she had clearance to go anywhere on the base that she wanted. The two of them continued on to the bridge. BB-9E reluctantly followed Rey, hoping that the two of them wouldn’t get caught, or that she would change her mind. He was fairly sure the bridge was the last place Master Ren would want her to be. Making sure she was safe and out of danger was always his first assignment. Unfortunately, that assignment was not as easy to follow as it looked. Particularly with Rey being so curious about everything. Rey spotted a dark corner with a direct view of where Ben was. She motioned for BB-9E to follow her. He whirred sadly. He had hoped that she wouldn’t still go through with this. The corner was tight, but it was secure. No one would see them from there. The two listened as Ben spoke with Hux. 

“There have been concerns, Commander. Regarding your recent behavior.” Hux stated. 

“What concerns?” Ben asked angrily, using the Force to choke Hux. Rey winced as he used his dark powers, but Hux was the last person that should see the light in him. She hoped that it was only an act.  
Hux gasped for breath but continued. “It is the girl. She has, altered you somehow. There are rumors that your weaker side is now exposed.” Hux spoke with disdain, and his struggles for breath became more difficult as Ben tightened his hold on Hux’s throat.

“Do I seem altered to you, General? Is this the face of someone weak?” He demanded, daring Hux to look at him. His face was as cold and hard as it always was when he was Kylo Ren. There was no trace of Ben Solo in him at that moment. He continued to tighten his grip even more. 

“No, Commander. My apologies. I will confirm that all is as it should be.” Hux continued to gasp for breath even though Ren had released him. 

“See that you do, General.” Ben left the bridge to return to his suite, having no more to say. He still had paperwork to do. It was even more important now with Hux watching his every move. Soon, the Supreme Leader would be watching him, if he wasn’t already. Once in his suite, the hand that he had used to choke Hux shook slightly. Hux was clearly a threat now, which meant that he was a threat to Rey as well. He had to do something. They would have to think of a plan and fast. If Hux was starting to notice what was going on, the Supreme Leader would too. It was only a matter of time.  
Rey and BB-9E left their hiding spot on the bridge. They moved quickly through the hallways and back to the suite. Hopefully they would get there before Ben got back. They were too late. To her surprise, Ben was smiling when Rey entered the room. 

“That’s one of the things I first liked about you. Your curiosity. It’s extremely attractive.” Rey blushed nervously. 

“You knew I was there?” 

“Did you think I couldn’t sense you were near?” 

“I just wanted to know what was going on. It’s worse than we thought, isn’t it?” 

“It is.” He nodded solemnly then reached for Rey’s hand. She took his hand and held it. 

“Rey, we need a plan and fast. Soon it will be too late. There’s only one way that we can destroy the First Order.” 

Without him even having to say anything, she knew what it was that he wanted to do. “Ben…We can’t. He’s too powerful.”

“We have to try, Rey. I can’t live like this anymore. I don’t know where we’ll go, but if we stop Snoke, we can be free. We can be together.” He held her hand and looked into her eyes, begging her to understand. 

“We could go back to the Resistance.” Rey said softly. As soon as she said it, she almost wanted to take it back. Just because she saw the good in him didn’t mean everyone else would. She was almost sure that they wouldn’t see it. But wasn’t it worth a shot?

“Rey, I…” Ben started, but stopped. The words were caught in his mouth. He wanted to say yes, but he wasn’t sure if he could. Of all her requests, why did it have to be something that he couldn’t give her easily? If he didn’t love her so much, this wouldn’t be so difficult. He had spent most of his life defending the First Order. He couldn’t just switch sides. 

Rey sensed his conflict and sighed sadly. “At least think about it.”

“It’s not that I wouldn’t willingly go back with you, Rey. It’s just that they wouldn’t want me back. I’ve terrorized everyone’s lives. They might try to kill me.”

“You don’t know that.” Rey shook her head, not wanting to believe the possibility that he was right. “We don’t know unless we try.” But Ben was more right than either of them knew at that moment.  
Back at the Resistance base…

“We have to do something.” Finn sat with Poe at a desk, looking over the recent reports about the activities of the First Order. Since Rey had agreed to stay with Kylo, things had been strangely quiet. Too quiet. Something was up. 

“Look, Finn. I want to do something to help, honest. But without the General’s approval, we can’t just launch an attack on the First Order. Well, unless you have a death wish.” Poe said.

“Rey could be in danger. Who knows what Kylo Ren is doing to her? He never promised he wouldn’t hurt her.”

“Should have made him agree to that.” Han Solo entered the room with Chewie, and the two looked up. 

Finn and Poe stood. “General Solo.” Han shook his head. “Save the formalities for Leia, not me. I don’t really care about titles.” Han and Leia had both been different since Rey had agreed to the deal with Kylo Ren. Han had always been closed off, but with Rey gone, he hardly spoke to anyone. Rey had made the deal, but he blamed himself for not going against Ren and finding another way. He and Leia wanted their son back so badly, but without knowing what was going on with Rey, there was even less hope that he would turn. It had been so long since there was light in him, it would take a miracle to bring it back. 

“Could Rey be in danger?” Poe asked. BB-8 chirped nervously then moaned softly. 

“I don’t know. It’s possible. Kylo Ren isn’t Ben Solo. He’s without mercy. It doesn’t help that we don’t know why he wanted her in the first place.”

“Then we should rescue Rey. Deal or no deal, she’s part of the Resistance. If she’s in danger, we need to help her.” Finn nodded in agreement. 

“I’ll talk to Leia. There’s no hope for Ben anymore. Surely she knows that by now. We can’t keep holding out for that anymore. We’re running out of time.” Chewie moaned slightly when Han mentioned Ben, remembering that little boy all those years ago. He had loved Ben as much as he loved Han, Leia, and Luke. He still cared about him, deep inside. Han and Leia did too. But they had taken enough risks. They couldn’t risk Rey. She was their only hope for defeating the First Order. It was time to attack the First Order. For Rey. 


	13. Chapter 13

Ben paced nervously in the living room of the suite, his grandfather watching him curiously. “Don’t you want to think about this more?” Anakin asked him, as if he wanted him to change his mind. Part of him did, but the other part of him understood that it was no different than when he had killed Sidious to save Luke. Luke had been his redemption and Rey was Ben’s. The two were made for each other, as he and Padme had been. Still, that didn’t mean that it would be easy. 

“There’s no other way. If Snoke lives, everyone will suffer. I didn’t care about that before, but Rey cares. For her sake, I need to start caring too. Even if I don’t know how.” Ben sighed. 

“You do, Ben. I’m proud of you. Returning to the light is never easy. But I know that you are making the right choice.”

“If only there wasn’t just light and dark. What if there was something else? I wish everything wasn’t so black and white.”

“I wish that too. There are times, even now, when I don’t feel like I’m as much of a part of the light as I used to be. But you just have to make an effort. It’s hard work, but it will be worth it in the end. I’m sure Rey can see how hard you’re trying now.” Anakin saw the way Ben’s eyes lit up when he mentioned Rey. He had seen that same light in Rey’s eyes when Padme mentioned Ben. If only the two would just admit that they were in love. They were so stubborn. He smiled fondly. The two of them were just like he and Padme were when they were younger. They had fought their feelings so hard for each other, but in the end, and after a long road, they had ended up together. He hoped the journey wouldn’t be as difficult for Rey and Ben. Ben was still good inside, he deserved as much happiness as anyone else did. 

“It’s not enough. Do or do not, remember?” Ben recalled Luke referencing the late Jedi Master Yoda. He had been the greatest Jedi of all time. Ben didn’t understand how he could have been so strong all that time. His trust in the Force never wavered. Not once had Master Yoda been tempted by the Dark Side. It was almost incomprehensible to him. 

“Master Yoda never did have much flexibility. He was so specific about everything.” Anakin recalled his own lessons with the late Jedi master. He had always felt out of place, never being good enough to be a true Jedi. Maybe if he had just listened more. 

“How did you turn back, Grandfather? No one ever told me. Maybe if they had…” Ben stopped. There was no guarantee he would have been any different, but anything was possible. If only he had just been given a chance. 

“You have to want to, Ben. It has to be for yourself, not for someone else. I know you love Rey,”

Ben started to interrupt, but Anakin continued on anyway.

“No point in denying it. You have that look. And she has it too. Padme and I have both seen it. But anyway, no matter how much you love her, you have to make your own choice to return to the light. She can help you, but it has to be your own actions.” 

“Grandfather, I can’t. I’m not strong enough.”

“Yet you’re willing to fight Snoke. I’ve seen your nightmares, Ben. You’re not just choosing to fight Snoke for her. It’s for yourself, too.”

“It’s different.”

“Is it?” Anakin asked curiously. It wasn’t any different. Destroying Snoke and returning to the light were both difficult choices. Neither could be done without the kind of strength that Ben had said he lacked. 

“You have the strength to do this, Ben. I see it and Rey sees it. You just have to believe in yourself. If you want this enough, you can come back. It’s not too late. I was far more gone than you were. Have faith, Ben.” Anakin left, and Ben felt alone. Rey had gone on a walk with BB-9E. She probably wouldn’t be back for some time. He looked back to where his grandfather had been and saw Rey standing there. 

“Missing me already?” She smiled. 

“What makes you think I was?” He teased playfully. 

“I just know. It was getting to cold to keep walking anyway, and BB-9E had a situation to attend to.”

“What situation?” He was no longer smiling. If his droid had been separated from Rey, that meant something was about to happen. They were in danger. 

“You and Kylo Ren will present yourselves to me.” She recognized Snoke’s voice. The voice chilled hear and she shivered. Her eyes shot open and she looked at Ben, wide-eyed. 

“Rey?” He looked at her, sensing something was wrong. What had she just seen? 

“The Supreme Leader. He knows. I don’t know how, but he knows. He wants us to go to him.”

“When?” Before Rey could answer, General Hux entered with two stormtroopers. Ben let go of Rey’s hand, but it was too late. Hux had seen them. Hux had told Snoke, no one else could have done it. Ben knew that Hux wanted his position and that he couldn’t get it unless he was gone. So that’s what this was about. Of course. 

“The Supreme Leader requests the presence of you and your wife, Commander.” Hux said icily but grinned like a troublesome cat, particularly his cat. And he certainly had claws of his own. Ben looked at Rey and sensed her fear. 

It will be alright.

I hope so. Rey responded to his thoughts. The telepathy was new, but it might give them a chance. There was no better time than now to try and defeat Snoke. They had one shot. 

“There was one more thing. My apologies, Lady Ren.” Rey looked at him, knowing that he was anything but sorry. It would have been hard to miss the gloating tone of his voice. One of the stormtroopers held out a pair of Imperial handcuffs. 

“That’s not necessary.” Ben cut in, not letting them get near Rey. “I am the commander here, Hux, not you. Or have you forgotten that?” 

“I hadn’t forgotten.” Hux smiled menacingly. “But my orders from the Supreme Leader are above yours. Unless you wish to question the Supreme Leader.” Ben said nothing else. He didn’t have it in him. Not yet anyway. 

“I thought so.” Hux nodded and the stormtrooper cuffed Rey. She walked next to Ben as they followed Hux to the Supreme Leader’s throne room. His grandfather was wrong, he didn’t have the strength to fight this. The First Order would win again. They reached an elevator and Hux stopped. 

“I’m sure you can find your own way.” Hux unlocked the elevator and Ben and Rey stepped in. At least they were finally alone. But not for long. They didn’t have much time. Rey turned towards Ben. He tried to avoid looking at her cuffed hands. This was all his fault. Once again. It seemed like she was always in danger because of him. He knew that he had promised to protect her when they were married, but he didn’t feel like he was holding up that end very well. He was more likely to get both of them into trouble before getting them out of it. 

“You don’t have to do this. I feel the conflict in you. It’s tearing you apart.” 

He looked at her but said nothing. 

“You don’t have to bow before Snoke. You can turn. I’ll help you.” She moved towards him and his eyes filled with sorrow as he turned towards her. 

“Rey, I…” He just couldn’t get the words out. He definitely wasn’t as eloquent as he used to be. 

“Yes?” She looked at him, hope shining in her eyes. 

“I want you to stand with me. I’m trying, but if you say you can help me, then I need that right now.” He wanted to say something, but the elevator doors opened before he could get another word out. He stiffened and walked with Rey towards Snoke’s throne. 

Rey stood, but he bowed before Snoke. What choice did he have? Rey didn’t look at him, only focusing on Snoke.

“Commander Ren, it has been a long time since you have come to see me. You no longer have your mask. Yet, it suits you to be without it. The mask was always a reminder of someone you could never be. I thought that you would be the new Vader, but alas you are not. All because of some scavenger.” Ben’s eyes flashed briefly, then stilled. He couldn’t give away his feelings, not if he wanted to protect Rey. She was so much more than a scavenger, though. The Supreme Leader severely underestimated her strength and courage. 

Snoke looked at Rey standing near Ben. Not close, but enough that Hux’s statements were confirmed. Using the Force, he took away Rey’s lightsaber, but left Kylo’s. 

“What makes you so special that he would give up his life’s work for you? A scavenger?” Snoke laughed, but Rey only glared at him. Anger flashing in her eyes. 

“Maybe because he found something else to work for. Something more important than you.” Rey said calmly, trying to hide the fear in her voice. But she knew that Snoke sensed it. 

“Foolish child. You think you can turn him? You underestimate the Dark Side. Let me help you understand.” Ben looked up as Snoke used the Force to call Rey towards him. He reached inside her mind, pulling at her memories. Rey screamed in agony, and Ben’s eyes hardened. As Snoke reached further into her mind, the pain grew. Ben felt the same pain and knew that he had to do something. For both of them. 

Memories of him and Rey flashed in front of his eyes as Snoke continued to torture Rey. She screamed in agony and he could feel her trying to resist Snoke. But Snoke was too powerful. Memories of him and Rey together flashed in front of Ben’s eyes as Snoke went through them, determined to see everything. 

The ceremony was relatively quick. The official had them recite everything in under an hour. Finally, the announcement was made that it was time to kiss the bride. Kylo and Rey’s eyes met, and he leaned in slowly and kissed her. He had meant it to be quick, but the kiss lingered on. To his surprise, Rey was kissing him back.

The two continued to look at each other, then Rey slowly leaned in and kissed him slowly. In that moment, she needed to know exactly how real he was. She needed to know that what she was feeling was real. She closed her eyes and felt him lean in to her kiss. He reached out a hand to cup her cheek and deepen the kiss further. She didn’t resist. She wanted him, she wanted all of him. And he wanted all of her. It was real. The two of them. There could be no mistake now. There had been no night more wonderful in her entire life. Now, they were completely together, joined as one. Nothing would be able to tear them apart now. 

When the music ended, he kissed her, and it was as if there was no one else in the room. He had forgotten that they weren’t alone. Suddenly he was embarrassed, but no one seemed to notice. This was a celebration for their wedding after all. They were expected to kiss. He hoped no one noticed how much in love they really were.

Snoke released Rey and laughed. “How foolish you both are. I knew your attachment was deep, but this was truly unexpected.” He released Rey and turned his attention towards Ben. 

“Kylo Ren, your moment has come. It is time for you to complete your training and to show your loyalty to me and to the Dark Side. Destroy her and you will become the Sith Lord that you were meant to be.” Snoke laughed wickedly. “You know what you must do.”


	14. Chapter 14

Snoke watched Ben as his eyes turned towards his saber. He knew that he couldn’t kill Rey, but Snoke didn’t know that. There could be no other moment but now. Once and for all, he would have to kill Snoke. After seeing Rey suffer as Snoke had tortured her, Ben knew what he had to do. And hopefully, Snoke wouldn’t see it coming. 

“Ben…” Rey’s eyes widened in fear. She saw the conflict within him. If he were truly to go against Snoke now, it would require great strength. She hoped that he had it in him. She looked into his eyes. They had softened, and he struggled to keep his emotions in check. She knew what he was planning to do. 

“Well, Lord of the Knights of Ren, are you ready to fulfill your destiny?” 

Kylo grinned and used the Force to turn Rey’s lightsaber on Snoke’s throne. “Yes.” With a final flick of the Force, the lightsaber ignited and destroyed Snoke. Rey’s lightsaber flew back to her and she stared at him in shock. Then they smiled at each other. But it wasn’t over. Snoke’s Praetorian guards immediately turned towards Rey and Ben and the fight began. 

Rey and Ben fought the guards with their lightsabers, while the guards used their electric swords. Most of the guards converged on Ben and only one was fighting Rey. The guard started to attack, and Rey rushed towards him. There was power and energy as she slashed her lightsaber against the sword. They continued to fight, and the guard’s sword was close enough that it gave Rey’s arm a slight injury, a minor cut. She winced but kept fighting. She couldn’t stop now. She looked towards Ben and saw him fighting the three guards. He was an even more powerful fighter than her, clearly more advanced. Another guard came closer to her and she turned around to face him. 

Ben saw Rey looking at him as he fought the guards. He knew that she was impressed. As he was fighting, he saw one of the guards hurt Rey. Anger surged within him and fueled his fight even more. More of the guards fell, but it seemed like more were coming as well. Before he knew it, he and Rey were fighting the guards in the same spot, in the middle of the throne room. They fought in perfect sequence, as if they had been training together for years. Rey reached for his hand as she moved her leg to kick the guard in the face. Soon, the two turned around and they were fighting separately again.  
Two more guards approached Ben and he fought with everything in him. Suddenly, one of the guards had his arm around his neck. Ben tried to use his lightsaber against him, but he dropped it and the guard had him. After fighting her last guard, the one who had been next to Ben, she turned and saw the guard holding his neck. 

Immediately, she deactivated her lightsaber and tossed it to him. 

“Ben!” He looked up and caught the lightsaber, igniting it against the guard’s helmet. It went through it, and the guard fell. Ben gasped for breath and Rey moved towards him. He could tell that she was out of breath too. That was the most intense fight any of them had ever had. But it was worth it. 

Rey held him in her arms and he leaned into her embrace, glad to know that she was safe now. They both were. It was over. 

“I knew you could do it. You just had to believe in yourself.” Rey smiled at him and he could sense her joy and relief. 

“I wouldn’t have believed in myself if you hadn’t first. Thank you. I couldn’t have done it without you.” He leaned in to kiss her but saw a mirror out of the corner of his eye. Rey saw it too.  
“What is that?” 

“It was Snoke’s. It’s how we know what the Resistance is doing or anyone really.” He saw the look in her eyes and he knew what he had to do. No matter how much he wished that he didn’t. 

“How does it work?”

“You think about what you want to see most. What’s most important to you.”

Rey looked at him, and he knew that she was asking if she could use the mirror. He nodded, and Rey walked towards the mirror. 

She looked at it and closed her eyes, trying to visualize what mattered most. But her thoughts were clouded, she was torn. The most important person in her life was Ben, but she was still loyal to the Resistance and tried to focus on them. After breathing deeply, she opened her eyes and looked at what the mirror was showing her. It wasn’t what she expected. She saw Ben, on one side. As Ben Solo. It had to be him. There was no trace of Kylo Ren left within the man in the image. On the other side, she saw the Resistance and she knew that it was showing her what was happening now.  
Han Solo walked Poe, Finn, Rose and Leia to the hanger where the ships were held, including the Millennium Falcon. She felt Ben tense when he saw Han Solo, but he said nothing. Poe turned and addressed everyone. 

“It’s now or never everyone. If we don’t fight now, we will always be oppressed by the First Order. We must get Rey back, and we must kill Kylo Ren! There is no longer any choice. We fight to the death! Who’s with me?” He shouted, and the others cheered, but Han and Leia were silent. Han looked at Leia and saw the sorrow in her eyes. In her heart, Ben was still her son. Even now, she still thought that there was a chance. She hoped that there was. 

“Leia, I’m sorry. But we have to. With him, everyone else is in danger. This is for the Resistance.” 

“For the Resistance.” Leia agreed. The two of them continued to walk towards a large starship and Rey turned away. She couldn’t watch anymore. She looked at Ben, and he was silent. For once, he was completely speechless. It was as if all the breath was gone from his lungs. Even his own parents wanted him dead. It was really true. They hadn’t loved him. 

“I have to stop them.” Ben looked at Rey in surprise. She wanted to protect him? Did that mean…No, it couldn’t. She couldn’t possibly mean that she loved him enough to protect him. If only it were true. But no one could ever love someone like him. 

“You can go.” He said softly, wanting to take it back. He wanted her to stay here with him, forever. But he loved her too much to force her to stay. After all they had been through together, she deserved her freedom. He didn’t want to deny her what he knew she wanted most. 

“Ben, I can’t just leave you. You’re my husband. I promised. And I…” The words were right on the tip of her tongue, waiting to be said out loud. She couldn’t get the word out though, and tears slipped down her cheeks. She knew she loved him, enough to want to stay with him. But someone had to stop the Resistance. Otherwise they would kill him. After everything that the two of them had been through, she knew that he was worth saving. That whatever was still broken within him could still be fixed. 

Ben reached out his hand and wiped Rey’s tears from her cheeks. The two of them held each other for a while. He didn’t want to let her go. But he knew that she was going back for him and if she did love him, she would come back. They wouldn’t be apart for ever. 

“Rey, you have to go. I’ll wait for you, I promise. Where else am I going to go anyway?” He laughed slightly, but the mood was still sorrowful. 

“I will be back, Ben. I promise. “I need someone to show me my place in all this. And you, you’re that person. We were meant to be together.”

“It was our destiny.” He agreed and kissed Rey passionately, part of him fearing that he wouldn’t see her again. 

Rey looked at him one last time then walked out of the throne room. Ben heard the sound of a lightsaber deactivating and turned around. His grandfather was holding his lightsaber.  
“I probably shouldn’t have left you kids alone. This will take forever to get cleaned up. Reminds me of my Jedi days. If only Obi-Wan were here to see this.” Anakin smiled, and Ben knew that he was teasing. But Ben couldn’t bring himself to smile back. Rey was gone. 

“That was the most selfless thing you have ever done, Ben. And I’m proud of you.” 

“I lost her. The only person who might ever truly love me and now she’s gone.” 

“Do you have such little faith in her that you think she won’t come back?” Anakin asked curiously, sensing Ben’s deep pain at the loss of his wife. 

“I don’t know what to think. Why would she come back?” Anakin was surprised at how little Ben thought of himself, but he knew that part of it had to do with his childhood. He had seen glimpses of Ben when he was younger, watching over him partly. He had seen how Han and Leia had always left him alone or talked softly about him. He knew that, at least a part of Leia, truly did love Ben. She just hadn’t been good at showing it. Han, though. He had never thought much of Ben at all, never wanting to be around him. It wasn’t a mystery why Ben had turned to the Dark Side. No one had ever showed him that they cared about him. Anakin knew that Luke had been even less compassionate, always viewing their relationship as student and master, never uncle and nephew. If only he could have been there for his grandson. If he had, maybe Ben wouldn’t be in so much pain now. 

“You just have to trust her, Ben. I think she will come back. You’ll see.” Ben sighed, but part of him knew that his grandfather was right. Suddenly, General Hux entered the room. He saw the room filled with fallen Praetorian guards and Kylo Ren in the middle of it all. But Rey was nowhere to be found. 

“What happened to the Supreme Leader, Ren?” Hux’s voice was harsh and bitter. 

“Nothing of your concern, General. I don’t have to answer to you. I’m still in charge.” 

“Are you? In that case, I’m relieving you of your position as Commander for someone more suited.” 

“You can certainly try. Can’t promise you’ll succeed.” Ben ignited his lightsaber and Hux picked up one of the electric swords. And so began their duel.

Rey had gotten past the stormtroopers and made it to the hanger. There was a small Tie-Fighter waiting on one of the launch bays. She knew how to fly that. Ben had taught her how to fly one just two weeks ago. Had it only been a few weeks since they were still enjoying each other’s company and being free to just be each other? She missed Ben already. But she had to do this for him. She had to convince the Resistance not to kill him. But how? 


	15. Chapter 15

Rey inputted the coordinates of the Resistance base into the Tie-Fighter. Pulling out of the hanger, she flew away from Starkiller Base and from Ben. She hoped that he was alright. Suddenly, she heard chirping behind her. Turning the ship on autopilot, she turned towards the sound.

“BB-9E? What are you doing here?” The droid chirped cheerfully, ignoring her surprise at seeing him. 

“Did Ben send you?” The droid shook his head and whirred sadly. He hadn’t wanted to leave his master behind. But he knew that Rey might need him. Besides, orders came first. 

“I wish he were here.” Rey sighed and BB-9E whirred in agreement. 

Soon, the Resistance base was in sight. Rey landed the ship and stepped out. BB-9E followed her. She saw Han, Leia, Finn, Rose and Poe all standing together. She sighed in relief. They hadn’t left yet. She still had a chance to save Ben. 

“Alright, everyone. Follow me! It’s time to kill Kylo Ren and end the First Order!” Poe shouted. BB-8 whirred uncertainly behind him. As much as he wanted the First Order to end, killing Kylo Ren wouldn’t be without consequence. Sometimes his master’s plans weren’t thought through very well. Including this one. 

“No, stop!” Rey shouted, and everyone turned to look at her. 

“Rey?” Han looked at her, shocked. Rey was alive? He would have thought that Kylo Ren would have done something to her by now. Finn and Rose sighed in relief seeing their friend alive, and Leia smiled. 

“I won’t let you do this! You can’t kill Kylo Ren!” Everyone continued to stare at her. 

“Why not? Don’t tell me you feel something for this monster. Imagine that.” Poe smirked. Rey couldn’t possibly feel something for a creature like Ren. Then he noticed the wedding ring on her finger. It couldn’t be. It was impossible. 

“He’s different than you think he is. You have to trust me. I’ve seen the light in him.” Rey looked around, but it didn’t look like anyone believed her. BB-9E whirred worriedly behind her. 

“It would seem that Ren has sent a spy.” Poe remarked, upon seeing the droid. Everyone turned to look at the droid behind Rey. 

“It’s a First Order droid. It belongs to Kylo Ren.” Finn confirmed. He remembered this one all too well. 

“He, actually.” Rey corrected. “And he isn’t a spy. You have to believe us.”

Leia stepped forward. “Rey, you understand how difficult that is right now. Frankly, I’m surprised that you brought such a droid into a place as confidential as our base. That droid is going to remember these coordinates and lead the First Order right to us. And if not the droid, the tie-fighter you brought can certainly be tracked.”

“I can promise…” Rey started, but Leia interrupted. 

“Rey, you know that I’ve waited a long time to hear that Ben is back. But it’s just too much. The Resistance has already been waiting too long and can no longer afford to hope for that. If there was so much light in him, why didn’t he come here with you?”

Rey hesitated. Even she couldn’t answer that. Only Ben could. 

“I’m sorry, Rey. False hope is worse than no hope at all. And besides, you are wearing his ring. I think that answers any other questions.” Rey looked at Leia in shock. Did Leia really believe that she was defending Ben just because she had married him? 

She turned around and saw everyone looking at her the same way Leia had. No one believed her. All because of a wedding ring. BB-9E chirped behind her in small, worried beeps. 

“You’re right. We shouldn’t have come. Come on.” Rey turned to leave, but Finn stopped her. 

“What do I do with her, General?”

Leia sighed. “You know what to do, Finn. We just can’t afford any false information. I cannot put anymore hope in the possibility of my son joining the light. She’s just saying it to save him, not because it’s true.”

“No, Leia, I’m telling the truth!” Rey shouted as Finn and Rose held her back. 

“It’s General Organa to you, Rey. And you are no longer a member of the Resistance. I feel foolish for placing my faith in someone who was so easily seduced.” Rey’s cheeks turned a crimson color. Was that all Leia thought it was? 

“Take her away. We need to keep her somewhere that she can’t go after Kylo Ren.” 

BB-9E whirred dejectedly and followed the people who were holding Rey captive. He had to help her escape. Luckily enough, no one seemed like they were going to restrain him. He had to help Mistress Rey get back to Master Ren. It seemed like there was danger back on Starkiller Base. 

Rey tried pleading with Finn and Rose to release her, but her pleas fell on deaf ears. So much for friends. Weren’t friends supposed to be there when you needed them? She had never imagined that they would lock her up. They reached a dark room, and Rey recognized it as a detention cell. After they locked the door, Finn looked like he wanted to say something, but Rose shook her head and glared at Rey. Now she was truly alone. She sat and cried, hoping that Ben was alright. She wished that there was still a chance to save him. 

Suddenly, she heard a loud whistling sound. She looked up and saw BB-9E and BB-8. Both droids looked at her and chirped cheerfully. Rey wiped her tears and watched in shock as BB-8 unlocked the door. Was he defecting? He had always been loyal to Poe. 

BB-8 whirred sadly and Rey understood. The droid didn’t want to be apart of killing anyone. She could understand that. 

BB-9E let out a short series of chirps and BB-8 answered back similarly. Rey sighed sadly. If they had left already, then she was running out of time to get back to Starkiller Base. She raced back towards the hanger, with the two droids at her heels, chirping at her encouragingly. 

Hux and Ben continued to fight. But Ben was weaker. He was thinking of Rey and starting to feel that she wasn’t coming back. Once again, he had placed his trust in the wrong person, and this time he had actually loved someone. He wanted to believe that she would return, but now that she had her freedom and could be with the Resistance again, why would she come back? 

Hux knew what Ren was thinking about. That girl was his greatest weakness and would be Ren’s death. Ren could no longer fight well, and he was weak. He was losing the will to fight and survive. And Hux would gladly take advantage of that. He slashed his sword as Ren held up his lightsaber, but Ren wasn’t fast enough. The sword cut into his arm and he winced but kept fighting. 

“How foolish you are, Ren. Trusting a mere scavenger to come and save you? Truly, you are unworthy to fight for the First Order any longer. It is time for you to die.” Hux raised his sword and Ren released his hold on his lightsaber. Why fight back anymore? There was no point to it. He waited to feel the pain from the electric sword, but then he heard a voice. 

“Ben?” Rey stood in the doorway looking at him. Her hazel eyes shining. He used the Force to push Hux out of the way, then stood up. He went up to Rey and held her in his arms. 

“You came back?”

“What kind of wife would leave her husband?” Rey smiled at him and Ben returned it as he leaned in to kiss Rey, but he didn’t know that Hux was behind him. Hux grabbed his electric sword and stabbed Ben in the side. Rey’s eyes glared at Hux with anger and she activated her lightsaber. Ben called his saber to him and did the same. Both had their lightsabers pointed directly at Hux’s throat. 

“I would suggest you leave, now. Before I change my mind and kill you myself.” Ben’s deep voice startled Rey and she saw the anger in his eyes as he looked at Hux. But even Hux knew when to quit. He nodded and both Ben and Rey lowered their lightsabers. Hux ran out of the room and Ben fell to the ground, the wound from Hux’s sword going deeper into his side. Rey sat next to him and looked into his eyes. He looked at her softly as the tears fell down from her beautiful eyes. His breaths were shaky and uneven. Rey stroked his cheek gently.

“This is all my fault. If only I hadn’t left you.” Rey’s voice was soft, and he could tell that she was heartbroken. Over him? Maybe. 

“Rey, it’s not your fault. You needed to go back to the Resistance.”

“Without your droid and the help of BB-8, I don’t think I could have escaped. No one believed me. They thought I was saying you had changed because of we were married. Once they saw the ring, no one would listen to me. And then Leia had me locked up. I never imagined that she would do something like that.”

“I’m sorry, Rey. I know how much you cared about them. It seems today is a day for loss.”

“Ben, don’t talk like that. You’ll be alright. We’re together again and I won’t leave you.”

“But I might have to leave you. Thank you for coming back. I’m glad I got to see you one last time.”

“Ben, you can’t give up. You have to fight this.” Rey sobbed, and she saw his eyes start to close. She couldn’t lose him, not now. 

“Please, Ben, don’t leave me. I love you. With everything in me.” His eyes continued to close, and she leaned into his chest, crying. 

Ben heard Rey’s voice start to fade away and suddenly he was standing next to his grandfather. There were stars around them. 

“Where am I?” Ben asked, startled. 

“This is the Force. Thanks to you, all of us who were watching over you are all free to be one with the Force now, including you.” 

Ben shook his head. “No, I can’t leave Rey. I love her. She’s a part of me and I’m a part of her. She means everything to me. I have to get back to her.” 

“Then it is true. You are Ben Solo once again.”

“Yes.” Ben agreed. “There is light in me again.”

“Then go to her, you must.” Master Yoda walked up to them. Anakin and Ben nodded their heads in acknowledgment. “Made the right choice, you have. Proud of you, we all are, Young Solo.”

“Thank you, Master Yoda.” Ben smiled and when he opened his eyes, Rey was staring at him. 

“Ben, is it really you?” She gasped softly, hoping that it was really him. 

“It’s me, Rey. I’m not Kylo Ren anymore. And I love you.” 

“I love you too, Ben. Always.” As the two of them kissed, everything around them seemed brighter. They closed their eyes as the kiss deepened, and when they opened their eyes everything was different. They were no longer aboard Starkiller Base. Instead, they were at the royal palace on Naboo. Specifically, on the royal balcony. They turned around and saw Padme. 

“I couldn’t leave without giving you both a gift.” She smiled and looked at Anakin standing next to her. Obi-Wan stood to the side, but he smiled at Rey. 

“Thanks to the two of you, peace is restored to the galaxy and balance to the Force. The fight between the First Order and the Resistance has now ended. That wouldn’t have been possible without either of you. And so, as a thank you, it has been decided that the two of you will rule as king and queen, together.”

“I’m proud of you, Ben. I knew that you could do it.”

“I had some help.” He acknowledged, looking at Rey. None of these changes would have been possible without her. Ben held Rey’s hand and the two of them smiled. It was more than either of them could have expected. Suddenly, Ben released Rey’s hand and stepped forwards towards his grandmother. He almost didn’t want to know, but he knew that he had to find out where his parents were. 

“Ben, if you don’t want to know, you don’t have to.” Rey sensed the trouble within and knew that this would be the most difficult thing that he had ever done. 

“I think both of us have to know, Rey.” They looked at each other again and then towards the balcony doors. There stood Han and Leia, but they didn’t seem any different than when Rey had seen them a few hours ago. No one seemed to know what to say and no one seemed to be moving any closer. 

After what they had done to both him and Rey, Ben didn’t trust them. But he had promised to try to get along with the Resistance and that applied to them. Or at least, it had. Now there was no more Resistance or First Order, thanks to him and Rey. He held Rey’s hand and approached them stiffly. All formality, nothing else. Rey was cautious as well, not wanting to be locked up again. She reached into the Force and felt the emotions within them. It was joy, but also hurt and regret.


	16. Epilogue

Leia was the first to say something. 

“Rey, Ben,” Ben stiffened, but didn’t make eye contact. “I’m sorry about what happened, to both of you. I should have listened to you, Rey. I shouldn’t have assumed that your marriage dictated your actions. I know mine never did.” Han grinned slightly and nodded in agreement. Leia had never done anything or said anything because he told her to. She had her own mind. 

“And Ben, I know that I wasn’t there for you like I should have been. I have always regretted that. Is there any chance that either of you could forgive me?” Rey looked at Ben and saw the hurt in his eyes. He hadn’t expected Leia to regret anything. Could he really trust her? 

He continued to hold Rey’s hand for support and remarked stiffly, “Yes, I think we both can forgive you, in time.” Rey nodded, but wasn’t sure what else to say. Ben remained distant. He hadn’t realized how much he had actually missed his mother after all these years, but he didn’t want to get hurt again. With Han though, the feelings hadn’t changed. Considering his father had said nothing throughout the apology, he didn’t think that he had anything to add. 

“Han Solo, I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time.”

Han and Ben stepped forward, but both were wary of each other. 

“It’s about time you took off that ridiculous mask.”

“Han…” Leia started, but he only looked at her.

“I’m surprised that you noticed. But I’m not the only one who’s ever hid behind something. At least now there’s nothing left to say.”

“I just wanted my son back.” 

“I wanted my father. Seems neither of us got what we wanted. How disappointing.” 

“Perhaps I misjudged you.”

“Not sure you were even around enough to judge. It’s too late now.”

“I guess it is.” He and his father would always be at odds. But if Han would be civil, he would too. Before any more awkward silence took over, Ben left the balcony and went off find his and Rey’s suites. Suddenly, he heard soft footsteps behind him. Rey. 

“Ben, are you alright?” He shook his head and stroked her cheek softly. She leaned in, then leaned into him closer. Rey buried her face in his chest and they stayed like that for a while. Han and Leia watched the two of them from a distance. 

“It seems like she really does care about him,” Han muttered softly, not wanting to believe it. Even after all this time, he still only saw the darkness and not the light that was so apparent to everyone else. Leia saw that light, but Han was still convinced that both she and Rey saw only what they wanted to see. Han regretted the pain that his actions towards Ben had caused Leia but didn’t want to let Ben back into his life. Even if he did, Ben wasn’t willing and unless Leia said something, neither was he. He left the room and Leia followed him as they continued to walk through the palace. No one had lived here in years, so a lot of work and repairs would need to be done to restore it to its former glory. But the palace wasn’t the only thing needing repairs. She knew that Han and Ben were set on their differences, but she hoped that someday they might reconcile. It seemed that day was a long way off. 

After holding each other for a while, Ben and Rey went off to find their room, wanting to be away from everyone else. It had been slightly uncomfortable seeing Han and Leia so soon after the events of what had only been last night. Both were still cautious around the two. After seeing the way Han and Ben spoke to each other, Rey understood why they didn’t really have much of a relationship. Neither of them trusted each other. She wanted to believe that Han cared about Ben, but she hadn’t been able to sense it. It was clear that Leia did seem to love Ben, but with Han, there weren’t any emotions like that. His anger towards Ben was strong, and the feeling was mutual. If only Padme had waited before bringing Han and Leia back into their lives. It might have been too much too soon. 

After walking down a long series of hallways and making a few wrong turns, Rey and Ben ended up at what they hoped was their room. So far, they had found the throne room, the kitchen, which had fascinated Ben very much, and a small sitting room. But no bedrooms. 

“Do you think we’ll be luckier if I open the door?” Ben teased, and Rey laughed. They opened the door together, hoping it was right and they could finally relax. At first, they thought that they had chosen the wrong room. This was a large set of suites, more elegant than any of them had ever seen. 

“I hope this is it,” Ben muttered.

“It is,” Padme said, appearing with Anakin. It seemed that they hadn’t had to leave yet. “These were my rooms when I was Queen, and now their yours.” 

“Thank you. I’ve never seen rooms like this anywhere.” Rey continued to explore the suite, but Ben stayed behind. 

“Thank you, Grandmother.” Ben smiled but didn’t make a big show of it as Rey had. Anakin turned around when Obi-Wan approached. But his smile was gone as soon as Obi-Wan spoke.  
“It is time to go. The Force is calling us home.” Padme’s smile disappeared as well. Ben left the room and came back with Rey. 

“It seems they’re leaving us,” He said sadly. He had hardly had any time with them. They were his only family left, besides Rey. He wasn’t sure about Leia, but he knew about Han. Even after everything, Han still didn’t care. Ben was sure he never would. 

“No, you can’t leave. We need you.” Rey said softly, as tears fell. “What will we do without you?” Ben held her gently as she continued to cry. 

“We’ll always be with both of you. You will the greatest king and queen this galaxy has ever seen. Even better than me. Both of you have proven your strength of heart and you have what it takes to set everything right. You’ve already done so much.” Padme smiled, and Rey went up to her and hugged her. 

“I’ll miss you. I wish you didn’t have to go.” Padme and Anakin looked at each other. 

“Please, Grandfather. Don’t go.” Ben struggled to hold his own emotions back. He hadn’t known his grandfather very long. He couldn’t lose him now, especially with his father as absent as he was.  
“Obi-Wan, isn’t there a way we could stay?” Both Padme and Anakin looked desperately at him. Neither of them wanted to leave. 

“What about being a part of the Force, fulfilling your destiny?”

“I didn’t fulfill the prophecy. They did. With Rey and Ben together, they brought balance to the Force, not me.” Suddenly, another Force ghost appeared. Two actually. Luke and Master Yoda.  
“Grown, your nephew has. Has he not, young Skywalker?” Yoda turned towards Luke. 

“It seems he has.” Luke acknowledged. Upon hearing Luke’s voice, Ben looked up, surprised. He had never expected to be able to see Luke. 

“Uncle Luke?” His voice was soft, like a whisper. 

Luke looked at Ben, hardly recognizing him. When he looked at him, he no longer saw Kylo Ren and he no longer saw a boy looking for his destiny. Ben had grown up and turned out to be so much more than Luke had ever expected of him. 

“I’m proud of you, Ben. More than I can say.”

“Thank you. But it wouldn’t be like this without Rey.”

“I’m sorry for quitting on both of you. Both of you are much stronger than I could have ever foreseen.” Luke smiled, and Ben smiled back. There was hope for reconciliation at last.  
“May the Force be with both of you.” 

“May the Force be with you, as well.” Ben and Rey called back. 

“Skywalker has learned his lesson, has he not, my young padawan?” Yoda turned to Luke, who nodded.

“Ben, I realized I forgot to give you and Rey a wedding gift. If you wish, I could give it to both of you now.”

“I wasn’t aware that you knew we got married.”

“Hard to miss, it was. At least two Jedi have broken the rules now. Anakin being the first. Meant to be broken, that rule. It seems.” 

“Anyway, your gift.” Luke continued. “If you wish it, anyone who remained with you at Starkiller Base is free to return to stay with you permanently. As they were.” 

Ben and Rey turned towards Anakin, Padme, and Obi-Wan. To think that they would never have to leave! It was what both of them wanted and yet, was it what they wanted? 

“Before you ask, I know that Padme and I certainly want to stay. It would seem that we are going to be great-grandparents soon.” The shock on both Rey’s and Ben’s face would have been impossible to miss. 

“He’s kidding, right?” Ben looked at Rey, who was as surprised as he was. 

“I hope so.” Both of them looked at Anakin, who couldn’t stop laughing. Obi-Wan simply rolled his eyes. 

“In that case, I’ll stay as well. This could be interesting.”

“You don’t happen to know how many children, do you grandfather?” Ben asked skeptically, not entirely wanting to know. Of all the things, he had expected to hear, this hadn’t been one of them. 

“Let’s just say, you might want to prepare for double.”

 

THE END


End file.
